They jokes
All right, I know one joke. Um, there's a mollusk, see? And he walks up to a sea...
Well, he doesn't walk up, he swims up.
Well, actually, the mollusk isn't moving, he's in one place.
And then the sea cucumber, well, they... I mixed up.
There was a mollusk and a sea cucumber. None of them were walking, so forget that...
There was this mollusk and he walks up to a sea cucumber. Normally they don't talk, sea cucumbers, but in a joke, everyone talks.
So just then, the sea cucumber looks over to the mollusk and says, "With fronds like these, who needs anemones?"
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and orphans?
At least the Twin Towers saw the parents they crashed on.
I think they are New York Jets fans and the Jets QB helped them... That's why one of them was off target.
Did you hear about the dyslexic couple who were struggling to have sex? They kept doing the 96 positions.
Children are like pills.
The smaller they are, the easier they are to take.
Why do Chinese people never play baseball?
Because they always eat the bat.
Why were the Twin Towers mad during 9/11?
They ordered pepperoni pizza, but instead got plane.
Why don't terrorists like Walmart?
They prefer a Target.
Why is America so bad at playing chess?
They lost two towers.
Did you know that good Catholic girls like to WAP?
Yeah, they are all about Worship and Prayer.
What does a sex offender and Santa have in common?
They will come down your "chimney" tonight.
How can you tell if someone Amish is an alcoholic? They keep falling off the wagon.
My lesbian friends bought me a gold timepiece for my birthday.
But, I think they got confused when I said, "I wanna watch!"
Why were the Twin Towers mad? Because they ordered pizzas and they only got plain: one came late, and then went to the wrong location.
The Twin Towers were mad at each other, so they all just started launching planes at themselves.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They won't be able to find home.
Why can't two eggs tell jokes?
Because they will crack each other up!
Why can't New Yorkers play chess?
Because they lost their towers.
How do you think they found out cows produce milk?
Two kids having fun in the barn.
You know what they call pineapples in Paris?
I don't know, what?
Anus.