Thereness jokes
I don't get this. Why is it I go to an orphanage and all of a sudden they said I used to be the cutest baby there?
Alabama.
Every time there's a family reunion, a baby is born 9 months later.
What is an orphan's least favorite movie?
Spider-Man, because it told them there was no way home.
There are only 2 things I hate in this world:
1. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures. 2. The French.
Why is there air conditioning in hospitals?
To keep the vegetables cold and fresh.
How do you know if a Black woman is pregnant?
Stick a chicken wing up there.
I asked my mom what is dark humor. She said "see them boy over there in the wheelchair, ask him to walk." I said, "but I’m blind." She responded, "Exactly."
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Lion 🦁.
Lion who?
Lion again, aren't you?
What’s the best part about having sex with 23 year olds... there’s 20 of them.
Knock knock. Who's there? A boy. A boy who? A boy who can't reach the doorbell knocking at your door.
Here's a sex joke.
What's the best part of having sex with 28 year olds? There's 20 of them.
What do you tell a depressed person?
Just hang in there!
What does Michael Jackson have in common with Kmart?
They're both dead...
Why are there so many scars and cuts on your arm?
Because it's a battlefield.
I made a website to adopt orphans. But there is no home page.
A few kids were talking about how big their houses were. Kids were pointing to huge houses and huge apartments. One little boy said, "Bet I have the biggest home." To everyone's surprise, he pointed right towards the massive orphanage.
Why are the Twin Towers and genders so similar?
Because there used to be two of them, but it's offensive to joke about that now.
Advertisement: "What's in your wallet?"
Me: "The same amount of money as there is my will to live... ;_)"
My girlfriend died in Tokyo during a tsunami. I was sad, but my friend told me, "Don't worry, there are plenty more in the ocean."
Who’s stronger in a relationship, a man or a woman? A woman, because it takes six men to carry him to his grave; it only takes one woman to put him there.