Thereness jokes

How do Ephippians celebrate their kids' first birthday?

Put a flower on their gravestone.

There is a country in Africa. It's called Djibouti. It has a crack in it!

Last night little Johnny went to his room and saw people hanging out there, little balls.

I love telling good news to my patients, like they survived the crash but their family died.

Why do orphans become bullies?

Because their mum and dad were never there for them.

What happens if you put your hand in glue? Your hand will stay there forever! I'm joking, hahaha!

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

I eat mop.

A-I eat mop who?

Why do duckies wipe after they poop?

Their butt quack.

Okay so not a joke but like- There's a fucking noose in my school gym.

So, there was this kid, and he went to a store and said to a person there, "I'm emo." Then the person told the emo, "Why the hell are you here? Shouldn't you be hanging in a tree somewhere?"

What do Batman and orphans have in common?

Their parents died.

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "You're." "You're who?" "You're adopted!"

"Gwen, are you still there?"

Why do birds fly upside down over Poland?

There's nothing worth shitting on.

What kind of knickers is the best?

Windy knickers, because they're the best kind.

Ya know, genders are kind of like the Twin Towers.

There used to be 2 of them, but now it’s a touchy subject.

If there's ever a shooting at school, pull out an Uno reverse card.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Fuck. Fuck who? What, are you kidding me? I just wanted to tell you a joke!

There was an emo kid in their room, boom, they're all gone, now.

There are 10 million million million million million million million million particles in da universe that we can observe.

Yo mama took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd.