Thereness jokes
Man yelling at mailman realizes he's opening the mailbox.
Mailman: "There's a pipe bomb in your mailbox..."
Me when people ask how old my girlfriends are:
"There's 2, there're 4, there're 6, there're 8."
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Cabbage.
Cabbage who?
Cabbage doesn’t have a last name.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Broccoli.
Broccoli who?
Broccoli hasn’t got a surname!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Goliath.
Goliath who?
I need to Goliath down and sleep!
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common? There used to be two of them, but now it's a sensitive subject.
There are 206 bones in the human body, but I’d really like to have 207.
I hope there are no women on here because they just aren't that funny.
What's the difference between you and a Barbie? There is no difference. Both of your faces are fake.
What does the "W" stand for in Africa?
Water. Too bad there's no "W" in Africa.
The amount of women judging me for raping a poor lady is terrible. You weren't there. You don't know!
Did you hear about the boy who got raped by a group of women in the park whilst jogging? Now there are lots of male joggers in the area.
When there are more suicidal people, it means there are fewer suicidal people. That means there is an infinite generator of them.
I hate when people leave their cars running, especially in the summer.
I'm like, "You got Tracy Latimer in there or something?"
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
My name is Ach.
Ach who?
Bless you!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
My name is Ya.
Ya who?
Yahooooo!!!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ruff ruff.
Ruff ruff who?
Let the dogs out.
Why is there more water than water, because water is water.
There's a Mexican, Brazilian, and Cuban in a S60. Who's driving?
She responds: “See that man over there with no arms? Tell him to clap.”
The kid replies: “But, Mom, I’m blind!”
Mom: “Exactly.”