Them jokes

Q: How do you make an emo kid happy?

A: Give them a Happy Meal.

Subway trying to commemorate 9/11: CRASH INTO SUBWAY THIS SUBTEMBER 11TH TO GET 2 FOOTLONG SUBS FOR ONLY $9.11, THAT'S 2 FOOTLONG SUBS FOR $9.11 AND WATCH THEM FALL... INTO YOUR MOUTH!

What makes genders and Twin Towers similar?

There used to be two of them, and now it's a sensitive subject.

What do a deaf person and an orphan have in common? Neither of them can hear their parents.

I don't see why people say that emo kids don't like to hang out.

I've seen them hanging all day.

Why do humans hate aliens?

Because Fortnite took them out of the game, and I want aliens back in Fortnite!

I'm a pilot and my boss told me to fly people to New York, so I flew them to New York and hit the towers. That was a tragic story.

Why do orphans never get a car?

Because their parents need to buy them one.

To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos.

Then I made pizza because they don’t live in a swing state.

Parents are like food—not all kids get them.

What's the difference between an orphan and a slice of pizza?

Nothing, I eat both of them.

What can you tell [as] a difference between [a] man and a woman [in a] relationship?

Both of them are just full of shit.

Why can orphans never go to the shops?

'Cause the Talibans will plane dive into them.

What happens when a depressed kid try’s to high-five a tree?

The tree leaves them hanging.

I’m on top of things. Would you like to be one of them?

If someone licks your elbow, you won't feel it.

If you put your ear up to someone's leg, you can hear them say, "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!"

Most women are like the Twin Towers.

It's all fun and good when guys fly through them, but once the little people come jumping off them, it becomes sad and awful.

Three old women are sitting on a park bench. A man in a trench coat comes and flashes them.

The first woman had a stroke. The second woman had a stroke. The third woman couldn't quite reach.

There was this emo kid giving a high five to a tree... but the tree left them hanging :)

Why do basketball players hate gravity?

Because it's always bringing them down.