Them jokes

What would you call a person who hides in a house for 24 hours and then kills them?

Morgz.

What's the difference between milk and my dad?

Nothing, I apparently am allergic to both because I never see either of them.

Are the three little pigs orphans because their mom kicked them out of the house?

"Wubba Lubba Dub Dub" is one way to describe how my inner child acts, but yesterday I killed them. Now I hear "Wubba Lubba Dub Dub," I’m drowning in the tub.

Little Timmy is hanging out with Rapunzel, and he mentions Hugo and a few other characters from Varian And The Seven Kingdoms, and she responds with, “Who the frick are you talking about? Since I don’t know them, I got a surprise for you!” She wraps him up in Christmas wrapping paper labeled "For Eugene."

"Jordan, motherfucker, your face looks like a slut, and your life is trash. Stop picking on kids and LEAVE THEM HELL ALONE!"

So I was in the lunch room and was sitting by the peanut allergic kids' table. I stood up and I threw an opened bag of peanuts at them and yelled, "25 kill streak!" 🤣😂

Do you want to know why I hired a protractor to tutor my nephew in IIROC? Because he has degrees. 180 of them. So he's smar[t].

How do you keep a blind person entertained? Give them a piece of sandpaper and tell them it’s a word.

I saw a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back. One of them was having fun getting his knot-tying badge.

How does Stephen Hawking compete in the hurdles?

He ducks when he gets to them.

Fun fact: this category of jokes is the MOST hated one by feminists.

Unless you force them the point.

What if plants are farming us, giving us oxygen until we die, and turn into natural fertilizer which helps them?

I hope next time you ask your teacher to go to the toilet, your teacher says no, but when someone else asks, the teacher says yes to them.

Why are your eyes blue? Cuz they have food coloring in them.

There was 1 gay guy, who kissed 4576 gay guys. Then had sex with them, creaming so hard, all of the dicks cumming on his face.

Then he stopped and had sex again x6, now he was left with...

How do you get a million Pikachus in a bus?

You shove them on!

Why don’t orphans play hide and seek?

Because no one will look for them.

One day my sister was making hotdogs. My sister asked me if I wanted some. I said no. Then my sister asked my friend, and he always said no.

Then my sister said I have to eat it plain with no flavor. We have no ketchup, mustard, or onions. My friend said I got something to give it flavor. My sister said, "Okay."

My sister left the kitchen to get something. I asked my friend what are you going to do. Then he took the hotdog bread, opened it, and ran his penis all around it, and put some white cream that came out of his penis. I put the hotdogs on the bread. Then my sister came back and put hotdogs on the hotdog bread. I told my sister the hotdogs are ready. She ate them. I asked how were the hotdogs. My sister said, "I don’t know what flavor is this, but it is very tasty."

Papyrus: Sans, I have a joke. What do you call someone lazy and incompetent?

Sans: What do you call them?

Papyrus: YOU! NOW GET UP AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM, YOU LAZY BONES!