Whoever took my dildo,
I hope you're having a good time.
Whoever took my anti-depressant pills,
I hope you're fucking happy.
Once a naked woman robs a bank, but sadly, no one can remember her face...
Me and my girlfriend broke up, so I took her wheelchair, and she came crawling back.
To become a licensed airline pilot requires 1,500 hours (two years) of training. But it only takes 10 seconds to steal the pilot’s jacket and hat.
Someone broke into my house and took my anti-depressants... I hope they're happy now.
Somebody stole my joke
So i stole their spinal cord.
Ryan: Mother, if you had 10 cookies, and I took 4 away from you, how much do you have?
Mother: I will still have ten cookies, because I will not give any to you.
Ryan: What if I forcefully take 4 cookies away from you?
Mother: I will have 10 cookies and a dead body.
Ryan and his mother had cookies that day. Ryan took all 10 cookies. He was never seen again. R.I.P Ryan.
I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home, there were signs everywhere.
To whomever stole my anti-depression pills, I hope you're happy now.
i thought i told u the lock up when i left this morning this is why our shit gets stolen all the time
in the new grinch the whos would say he stole christmest get him then the grinch said im a orphan that changes everything the whos said what would they do if max was a orphan
To whoever stole my antidepressants, I hope you are happy now.
A kid named Billy gets his lunch money stolen at school. The bully later gets his allowance, the lunch money, and his wallet taken by his father.
The father then gets all the money taken from him by the bully’s grandfather along with his own wallet. The grandfather then takes the money and gets it stolen by Billy along with his own wallet.
Q: How do you know when an Asian broke into your house?
A: You can't find your dog.
To the man in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket, "You can hide but you can't run."
Why did the vegetable go to jail?
He kaled a man and stole a 9-carat gold bar.
Jack and Jill went up the hill both had Bacardi rum, when Jill's was gone she wanted Jacks that's why she took it from him
I never wanted to believe that my dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.
But when I got home, all the signs were there.
How do you know if an Asian has broke into your house? Your dog is gone. ;)
