The jokes

Deal

I made a deal with Satan. I would get a free pass to hell if I serve as a demon lord. So, see you guys at the end of times!

Victim

What was going through the head of a 9/11 victim on the 88th floor?

The 89th floor.

Adolf Hitler

It's just been discovered that as well as writing a book, Adolf Hitler also wrote one of the first computer games, "Mein Kraft."

Victim

Who were the fastest readers on the planet? 9/11 victims, they went through 80 stories in 10 seconds.

Hairline

I swear, if I compared the size of your mother and multiplied it by the time your dad was gone, it wouldn't even be close to your hairline.

Titanic

The Titanic movie cost $200 million dollars to make, meanwhile the Titanic ship cost $400 million to construct.

Titanic was made by Paramount and 20th Century Fox. CHEAPSKATES!

Sex

How fast is the speed of sex?

68 because at 69 you've got to turn around.

Smile

You know you have twisted humor when you crack a smile when a Minecraft farmer says he separates the white sheep from the colored ones.

Taliban

How do Taliban parents feed their babies?

"Here comes the plane... weeee, BOOM! 💥"

Orphan

The orphan wanted to go on a field trip, but he needed his parent's signature.

Orphan

What's an orphan's favorite toy?

A boomerang because it's the only thing that comes back.

Twin Towers

Why is the Leaning Tower of Pisa leaning? Because it has faster reflexes than the Twin Towers.

Pilot

“Who are the fastest readers in the world?”

“The 9/11 pilots, they did 30 stories in 7 seconds.”

Pornstar

What’s the difference between a pornstar covered in slime and The White Stripes?

One has "Icky Thump," and the other does "icky hump."

Refrigerator

What's the difference between a homo and a refrigerator?

A refrigerator doesn't fart when you pull your meat out.