Suicide jokes
What did the phone receptionist at the suicide hotline tell the callers?
Hang in there!
I would post a joke, but maybe it's too deadpan.
The teacher says to do your homework. I do. My friends do. One person never does any of his homework.
Eventually, we had to have fun. He said he didn't do it. WOW what did he do? I like to think he got smacked and nearly committed suicide.
Why do people not adhere to the corona measures?
Because they hate their lives and want to die.
Sometime ago I went to the morgue and asked if they took walk-ins.
Are you a rope? Because I wanna hang with you.
So sad when the emo kid tried to give a high five to a tree.
Too bad he left him hanging.
What was Jim Jones' favorite drink?
Killer Kool-Aid.
"Go big or go home," that's what some people say.
"Go loud and proud," that's what other people say.
"Go out with a big, loud bang!" that's what I say.
Are you a toaster? Because I want to take a bath with you ;)
How do you get a depressed person out of a tree?
You cut the rope...
if an emo doesn't get better by Christmas Santas reindeer won't be the only thing jumping off roofs this year
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Depresso expresso.
JK, bleach.
What did the rope say to me?
"Hey there man, you wanna hang later?"
What's a depressed kid's favorite holiday?.... Christmas because everything is hanging.
Why did I walk across the road?
To get hit by a car.
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Depresso expresso.
JK, it's bleach.
Sorry for all the jokes, I'll end it.
What do emos and apples have in common?
They both hang on trees.
You wanna know why I love trains?
They end my suffering.