Still jokes

Killer

  • One day I was walking along the street and I found some caution tape... Just sitting there torn up... Beat up, and you could barely unravel it anymore because I would just burst into shreds... It kinda reminded me of what happened to my sister's killer... They still haven’t found him yet... I’m really good at hide and seek!

    Thyme

  • A guy goes to the store to buy thyme.

    When he got back to put the thyme away he realized he still had thyme left. This was all for nothing, it was just a big waste of your thyme.

    Family

  • 💔 The Broken Family 💔 . Part 1

    Girl: Mom, dad tried to have sex with me last night.

    Mom: Are you serious?? (Shocked)

    Girl: Yah. He said I must kiss him after he didn't want to let me go.

    Mom: Am gonna kill ur dad (Angry)

    Girl: Please mom, we still need him, who will buy use food and clothes. You don't have a job mom.

    Mom: But what he did was wrong.

    Girl: I know.

    (SOUND OF A CAR COMING IN)

    Mom: Is that ur dad.

    Girl: Yes Mom

    Comment Part 2

    Sex

  • Fishing is like sex: when it is great, it is great; when it is not so great, it is still great!

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  • Game Night

  • Did you know that if you die you can still be a part of family game night!

    All you have to do is have your family cremate you and put you in an hour glass, and the games that use hour glasses, well, you will be a part of family game night.

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  • Blow job

  • My sister told me she liked Medusa.

    I said, "Huh?"

    My sister said my blow jobs are so good she looks up at the guy's facial expression, and when they look down, they do nothing but stay still.

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  • Ex

  • When you're so rich that you can buy anything, you end up getting a cow in your living room. Yeah, anyways, my ex is still in my living room.

    Dad

  • Son: Hi Dad, I'm Son.

    Dad: Hi Son, I'm Leaving You.

    Years later:

    Dad still did not come back.

    Meme

  • You know what's crazy? Is that the low taper fade, like, meme, is still MASSIVE. Still MASSIVE. Like, I'm still seeing like, new ones, that I've never seen before, and they're getting millions of likes and millions of views.

    Antidote

  • It’s important to establish a good vocabulary.

    If I had known the difference between the words “antidote” and “anecdote,” one of my best friends would still be alive.

    Fat

  • You’re so fat,

    that your family moved to the other side of the U.S.A., but they still see you.

    Emo

  • Why is the record for longest jump kept by an emo?

    They're still hanging.