What do you call a group of emos about to jump off a bridge? Suicide Squad.
Q: How are Asians like a box of chocolates?
A: Either way they'll kill your dog.
What do you call an autistic kid coming to school with a gun?
Special Forces incoming!
Yo mama's so ugly, even the kid in the wheelchair ran.
Q: What did the Jewish person say when he beat me in a race?
A: Eat my dust.
What do you call an Asian telephone?
Ling Ling.
Imagine a white van. Now imagine a white guy in the driver seat with a sombrero on and his arm out the window, and on the side of the van it says "Free Candy." But there's blood all over the van and a dead clown in the back.
When your mum went to the UK and wore a yellow jacket, everyone started yelling "Taxi! Taxi!"
👱♀️ 👱♂️What is the difference between two blondes and a Libertarian?
A Libertarian hasn't won a presidential election since 1972, and two blondes are too stupid to run in a presidential election.
What is an Italian massage?
An Italian Catholic priest giving a blowjob inside the confessional booth during Lent.
Yo momma's so fat, when she bought a fur coat, all animals went extinct.
What animal can jump the highest?
Emo kids because once they go up they never come back.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
In a deep village in Germany, an old man asked his granddaughter, "What are you doing?"
His granddaughter replies, "Removing Polish with chemicals."
Grandpa said, "When I was young, I did the same."
Ever wondered why my gay kids don't play basketball? Because they can't shoot the ball straight into the hoop.
How do Asian parents name their baby?
They drop a pot down a flight of stairs.
A Chinese, Japanese, South Korean, and North Korean all walk into a bar.
The Landlord says, "Why the same faces, lads?"
What is the difference between Chinese and Japanese?
Some smile, others beam.
What do feminists and dogs share in common? They need to be taken to obedience school.
- Yo mama is so fat, when she wears a yellow dress, people yell "Taxi!"
- Yo mama is so stupid, she tried to climb Mountain Dew.
- Yo mama is so ugly, she made a blind kid cry.
- Yo mama is so old, she knew Burger King when he was still a prince.
- Yo mama is so poor, she can't even afford to pay attention.