Stephen hawkings jokes

Stephen Hawking

"Stephen Hawking was talking about a cash register at Costco when he said I can’t stand these people. 😳😳😳😳😳😳 What did he saaaaaaayyyyyyy?"

Wing

Stephen Hawking is the fastest footballer ever--he could just charge up the Left Wing!

Word

Stephen Hawking's last words were, "Ethernet cable not detected, shutting down."

Anthem

How are Stephen Hawking and Kaepernick so much alike? They both don’t stand for the national anthem.

Movie

There's a new horror movie about Stephen Hawking.

It's called "Unplugged!"

House

MAN 1) Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?

MAN 2) No.

MAN 1) Neither did he.

Heaven

Why didn’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven? Because it’s a staircase, not a ramp.

Ramp

Why can’t Stephen Hawking go to Heaven?

Because there wasn’t a ramp.

Blackout

For Stephen Hawking, why is being drunk and having his power shut out the same?

He blacks out.

Wheelchair

Q. Why can't Stephen Hawking go to Heaven?

A. He can't get his wheelchair up the stairs.

Death

The reason Stephen Hawkings died is probably because he fell off his wheelchair, and he must've pressed shut down by accident.

Stairway

What did Stephen Hawking say on the stairway to heaven?

Oh, fuck! I can’t get up them.