Stephen Hawking

Stephen Hawking jokes

Shoulder

What does Stephen Hawking eat for his breakfast, lunch, and dinner?

His shoulder.

Difference

What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a baby?

Both of their legs don't work.

Bird

Why did the bird lay an egg on Stephen Hawkings?

Because he is Stephen HAWKings.

Death

Why did Stephen Hawking die? Because he got bummed too hard in the shower.

Entertainment

Person 1: Wasn’t Stephen Hawking on X Factor?

Person 2: No, why would he be on X Factor?

Person 1: For dancing.

Fire

Stephen Hawking was in a house fire. When he got out, people called him "Hot Wheels."

Family

Stephen Hawking's family was cruel. He fell over and got told to man up and walk it off.

Time

Stupid joke about Stephen Hawking that wasn't funny the first fucking time.

Stairway

When Stephen Hawking died, he saw the stairway to Heaven.

He thought to himself, "Oh God, this is awkward!"

Reboot

I heard Microsoft got charged, why?

They couldn’t reboot Stephen Hawking.

Fat

What do you call Stephen Hawking when he eats too much?

As fat as Ben Dingley.

Hell

Why did he go to hell? Because he couldn't use the stairs to Heaven.