Stephen Hawking

Stephen Hawking jokes

Death

Stephen Hawking died because his wife misunderstood him when he said, "My Windows Needs Updating." She had the double glazing removed, and he fell out and died.

Computer

I was using my computer one time and I pressed Ctrl-Alt-Delete, and Stephen Hawking went into a deep sleep.

Wheelchair

Have you ever heard Stephen Hawking sing?

"Head, shoulders, wheels and frames, wheels and frames!"

Wheelchair

In about ten days, Stephen Hawking's wheelchair is going to have its first and last service.

Road

Why did Stephen Hawking roll across the road?

Because he had amyotrophic lateral sclerosis.

Heaven

When we die we get sent to heaven, but when Stephen Hawking died, he was sent to the cloud.

Heaven

Why did Stephen Hawking make it to heaven?

He couldn't make it up the stairs.

Song

Stephen Hawking listens to the song "I Am Still Standing" and cries to himself.

Stephen

Someone was bullying Stephen, so I said, "Why do you not stand up for yourself?"

Organ Donor

I asked Stephen if he was an organ donor, and he said why.

I said, "That's a shame. I need parts for my go-cart."