Special jokes

Remember that you're unique, just like everyone else.

What’s better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics?

Not being retarded.

How can you be fast and slow at the same time, getting a gold medal in the Special Olympics?

When ordering food at a new restaurant, my wife asked the waiter what they do to prepare their chicken.

“Nothing special,” he explained. “We just tell them they’re going to die.”

You really put the R in special.

How do you kill a retard?

Give them a knife and say, "Who's special?"

What do you call a fudge packer who has special needs?

A gay black male that has Down Syndrome.

I specialize in jokes about orphans. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

A lady walked into a bar and ordered their special drink. The bartender then gave her a brown glass full of milk. The lady complained about this, but then the bartender said, "Just shut up and swallow!"

What do you call an autistic My Little Pony?

Twilight Special.

I asked my brother who is autistic how he found his gf. He said on a special website.

Funny jokes are like kids with autism.

They have special needs to make them.

What is the best way to kill a special ed kid?

Call them retarded.

A 10 year old girl lays in her bed and excitedly waits for Santa to come. When Santa eventually comes she giggles, shivers, and orgasms.

Finally, as a special thank you, she sucks off Santa’s wet cock.

I got mad at my white friend today. I, as a darker person, had told them to meet me outside at 3 o'clock. They, being VERY special that day, had said, "AM or PM?"

Laughing at their question, I said, "Honey, 3 AM, because I'll lose a fight at 3 PM."

What did the autistic kid say to his girlfriend after they broke up?

"I thought what we had was special!"

"John FK, he think he special car no top, everyone see like he on parade. Me, I stay hidden, secret style, no bullets find me. Much smar smarter, no? Scret lifestyle safety."

I know a lot of people hate tapeworms, but they will always have a special place in my heart.

Girls are like bacteria. The toxic ones are everywhere, and you have to take special care of the good ones.

A special quote: “I was gonna slap that girl into tomorrow!”