Special jokes
I'm always willing to go down on a special needs girl.
Momma always told me to eat my vegetables.
Orphan: "I get all the A pluses and y'all bad!"
And then I told him: "If you feel so special, try telling your parents. You can't, can you?"
What do you call disabled people that follow politics?
A special interest group.
What's a pedophile's favorite holiday?
Halloween. Free delivery!
I lost my virginity to a girl with Down syndrome. I told my mom I wanted my first time to be special.
Q: What is Michael Jackson's favourite vegetable?
A: The special ed. kid down the street.
Ali from Kazakhstan, he got small forehead, all his friends laugh. They say, "Ali, your forehead so tiny, you need magnifying glass to see!" But Ali, he not care, he proud of his unique look. When he wear hat, it look like top of mountain, so funny, everyone laugh with him. Ali know small forehead no problem, it make him special, like rare gem!
A special quote: “No, Mackenzie! You're the savage beast!”
Why is September 11th an awesome birthday to have?
Because no one forgets it! :)
What do you call a kid with a special sense of humor? Autism, hahaha!
People at school thought I had special powers. It was something called "Constant supervision."
Remember that you're unique, just like everyone else.
I went to a handicapped comedy club, but all the jokes they told were special, and they didn't know a lot about stand-up at all.
How does someone with Down's Syndrome vote?
Through a special ballot.
What do you call an autistic My Little Pony?
Twilight Special.
What do you call a fudge packer who has special needs?
A gay black male that has Down Syndrome.
Man: How do you prepare your chicken?
Waiter: Nothing special, we just tell them they’re going to die.
A cell phone in an upscale gym locker room in NYC rings and the man puts it on loud speaker next to him. Everyone else in the room stops to listen:
Man: Hello? Woman: Hi honey, it's me. Are you at the club? Man: Yes. Woman: I’m out shopping and found a beautiful leather coat. It’s only $2,000 – is it OK if I buy it? Man: Sure, go ahead if you like it that much. Woman: I also stopped by that new Lexus dealership and saw one of the new models I really like – it’s on an opening special. Man: How much? Woman: $90,000. Man: Wow! OK, but for that price I want it with all the options. Woman: Great! Oh, and one more thing... I was just talking to Jamie and found out that the house we wanted to buy last year is back on the market... they’re asking $980,000 for it. Remember it was well over a million when we looked at it? Man: I dunno. Make an offer for $900,000 and they’ll probably take it. If not, we can go the extra $80,000 if that’s what you really want. Woman: OK. I’ll see you later! I love you so much! Man: I love you to.
The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room were staring at him in astonishment, mouths wide open.
The man turns around and says: “Anyone know whose phone this is?”
What do you say to a depressed special kid?
“Why so down?”
What do you call a group of special ed kids with guns? Special forces.