Someone jokes

When someone says you're an orphan, say, "At least I was wanted, unlike you!"

Someone complimented me on my driving last week. They left a note saying, "Parking Fine!"

When someone says: "You're a mistake."

Say: "The only mistake I see is right in front of me."

What do you get when someone named Victoria falls? A Victoria Falls!

What's the difference between someone with dystonia and someone with misophonia?

One makes the annoying noises, while the other hates the annoying noises.

I'm bored. Someone wanna chat?

You're so fat, when someone calls you fat, you get depressed and cut you a slice of cake.

Why do orphans like to be gay?

So they can call someone "daddy."

Killing someone is better than killing yourself.

Why should you lose your virginity to an autistic person?

Because virginity needs to be lost with someone special.

Someone threatened to break into my house, but I am in a wheelchair. I said sure, and I moved everything upstairs and sat on the stairs so he couldn’t steal anything.

Yo chin is so bumpy, someone said, "Is that Mt. Everest?"

If someone called you ugly, say before you call me ugly, look in a mirror.

I hope you're an organ donor so your organs can go to someone who deserves them.

What's one way to drain someone's ego?

Hand them a mirror, and say they should see how ugly they turned out in life.

Someone is talking about you behind your back, make a run vhaleka.

So, my mom was talking to me and told me to go to the store. When I get there, there’s a sign, but then someone tells me that’s just someone with a ginormous forehead.

If all the class are straight but you think that someone is hiding that he's gay, you're an investiGAYtor.

Someone told me I looked gay today. I told him that my clothes just came out of the closet this morning.

If you ever think no one cares about you,

kill someone, then the news will.