Society jokes
What is the only thing worse than being told you're adopted?
Still being in the orphanage at 13.
What do you call a protest that gets crowded?
Human trafficking.
Hey, you know what I told the kid in a wheelchair?
I told him to be a stand-up comedian!
Doin your mom doin doin your mom
You know we straight with doin your mom
I'm doin your mom. Yes yours!
I first saw her in the Wal-Mart pickin out your drawers.
Big Dolly Parton hair like an 80s prom queen
But her ass was lookin' good all up in those mom-jeans.
I approached her in the checkout line, and said yo baby wassup?
She had two gallons of milk, and I was starin' at her jugs.
Five minutes later she agreed to get with me
So we went and rocked the minivan like Giggity. Giggity. Giggity.
I was ridin' your mom like she was Mario Kart.
I gave her a lift back to her crib cause her car wouldn't start.
She invited me in the house, and we started makin' out again.
How many times I tap that ass? OVER 9000!
Yeah. She called me Pledge cause I knocked the dust off it.
She later made me a sandwich and she cut the crust off it.
Cause she knows how I like it, and that I'm a little young
To be in the bed, butt-naked doin your mom.
Doin your mom doin doin your mom
You know we straight with doin your mom
I like your mama's big butt, and I cannot lie.
You other brothers can't deny that she's fly.
We make sexy time, yes and every night I tap that.
She saw me butt-naked, now she thinks I'm half black.
But your moms the best, the super M.I.L.F.
Cause she loves to toss the salad even though she ain't a chef
And I blame it on the al-al-al-cohol
But If I were you, I wouldn't kiss your mom on the mouth at all.
She likes the Donkey-Punch. She likes the Dirty Sanchez.
Sometimes she even likes to fool around in your bed.
She likes rough sex with handcuffs and I'll be honest
She likes me to Chris Brown her when she acts like Rihanna.
She's so therapeutic. When I need to cure my restlessness
I br-br-br-br-br-br-br-br motorboat your moms breastestess.
I didn't wanna tell you, but I had to write this song
Cause I'm in your house every night doin your mo-om.
Doin your mom doin doin your mom
You know we straight with doin your mom
I'm havin' sex with your mother
That makes me better than you.
I'm havin' sex with your mother
That makes me better than you.
Why do orphans like to play GTA?
Because it's the only time they are wanted.
What do you call a gay dwarf?
Coming out of the cupboard.
Hitler walks into his meeting room, turns to his trusted staff, and says, “I want you to organize the execution of 10,000 Jews and one kitten.”
Everyone looks around the table and, after a long silence, Goering pipes up. “Mein Fuhrer, why do you want to kill a kitten?”
Hitler smiles and turns to the rest of the table. “You see, no one cares about the Jews.”
I gotta do terrorist :)
Why do most orphans become prostitutes?...
'Cause they need to find someone to call DADDY.
Why are Asian's dicks too small?
So they can reset the calculator.
Why don’t pedophiles win races?
They like to come in a little behind.
We need to stop making orphan jokes like this because they aren’t mean enough. We need more cruel jokes.
I saw a kid crying, so I asked them, "Where are your parents?" Then she cried harder, so I left the orphanage.
I hate the poor, who's with me? The rich, all the way!
If an orphan were to get a takeaway, what’s the home address?
You know you have twisted humor when you crack a smile when a Minecraft farmer says he separates the white sheep from the colored ones.
Why can’t orphans have phones?
Because it has a home button.
Why don’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t get a home run.
Q: What do you call a virgin from Alabama?
A: An orphan.
If you're bored, punch an orphan.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What's the difference between a peanut and a priest?
With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.