What's something similar between a clogged pipe and a pregnant woman?
You fix both with a coat hanger.
Why is a sick person and California similar? They tend to burn up.
What similarities do peeping Toms and spies share?
They both see things they shouldn't.
You call me ugly, but maybe that is why we look alike.
Q: What do kidnappers and rapists have in common?
H: It's similar to shoes.
A: White Vans.
What is the similarity between a sloth and a depressed kid?
They both hang from trees.
What’s the similarity between peas from Tesco and emos?
They both have barcodes.
What’s similar between the twin towers and Kobe Bryant?
They both can crash down.
What do babies and grenades have in common? They both make noise when you throw them.
What are the similarities between a broken tire and me?
We were both caused by broken rubber.
Why are vaginas and the Mariana Trench similar? Lots of seamen go missing there.
What does a priest and a wristwatch have in common? They both start at 12.
You know what flowers and depressed people have in common?
Both end up getting cut.
What does 2016 and 2020 have in common?
A monkey caused worldwide outrage.
Why do orphans like Batman? They are 50% like him.
What do an orphan's parents and the Predator have in common?
They are both invisible.
What's the similarity between dogs and poor people?
They both eat from trash.
How are the Twin Towers and genders similar? There used to be two, but now it's a sensitive subject.
How is smoking similar to oral sex?
The closer to the butt you get the stronger the flavor! 🤢
What are the similarities between an orphan and a newborn plant?
Both their parents were separated.
