Short jokes
What do cats eat for breakfast?
"Mice Krispies!"
Why did the students eat their homework?
Because the teacher said it would be a piece of cake! 🎂😂
What is the difference between a wheelchair and a walker?
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Heaven.
Heaven who?
Heaven fun over there?
Why did the girl quit her job at the donut factory?
She was fed up with the hole business.
Dark humor never gets old, just like children with cancer.
Why are french fries rude?
I gave a blind kid a hand grenade and told him it's a beyblade.
What's black and sits on top of a staircase?
Stephen Hawking's after a house fire.
Why is Santa's sack always full?
Because he only comes once a year.
It only takes 4 inches to please a woman.
And it doesn’t matter if it’s credit or debit.
I actually want peace, not war.
That's what I always try reminding my girlfriend before beating her up.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite type of music?
Rock and Roll.
What do you call a homosexual wrestler?
Gay Mysterio.
My husband told me he just came into a lot of money.
Weird, he usually uses a sock.
What's an Alzheimer's victim's favorite musical group?
The Who?
The girl asks her boyfriend, "Are you jealous of my heart?"
He says, "No."
She says, "Because it's pumping in me and you're not."
What's the difference between a Syrian kindergarten and an ISIS hospital?
I wouldn't know, I'm just the drone operator.
How do you know a woman is blind?
Because she can’t see the kitchen or the laundry.
Why were the Twin Towers traumatized about eating?
After someone said, "HERE COMES THE AIR PLANE(s)," it just wasn't the same..........