Short jokes
I gave a homeless person a phone but did not give him a home button.
Why can't a homeless person be seen around your wife?
Because she'll ask for her cardboard box! Ahahah.
Why does everyone say there are mines in Bosnia? There are no-
Why can't the English play chess? Because they lost their queen. And why can't the US play chess? Because they lost their towers.
What do you call a pig in a blanket?
My wife on a cold day.
What's the difference between me and Spongebob?
Spongebob can actually get ripped.
Why are English people bad at chess? 'Cause they lost their Queen.
Why can't the US play chess? 'Cause they lost their towers.
What do you call a fat, lazy person who smokes weed? A baked potato.
Why aren't orphans good at poker?
Because they don't know what a "full home" is!
What did Osama get on his test when he was a kid? A 9/11.
How does a terrorist feed their kids?
"Here comes the airplane."
Did you know the food that was on the plane?
It was the bomb.
Who are the fastest readers ever? 9/11 victims, they went through 89 stories in 7 seconds.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because seven ate nine.
But 10 was afraid, why? Because it was in between 9 and 11.
In 9/11, people were dying for the pizza. But it was at the bottom, so they had to die for it literally.
Why can't England play Clash, Chess, or Checkers?
Because they lost their queen.
Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine.
Why is ten afraid? Because he’s in between nine and eleven.
Why did Sally not come home from school today?
Because she got hit by a bus.
Why did Sally not come home from school today?
Because she died by a flying brick!
Q: What song were the pilots of 9/11 listening to? A: 'So Let's Set The World On Fire.'