Short jokes
My mom told me to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Depresso espresso.
Nah, just kidding, it's bleach.
Q: What did one emo kid say to the other emo kid?
A: Wanna hang out?
1273. Depression got the best of me. I'm gonna cry in my room now.
Why can a gay man give a better brojob to a heterosexual man than another heterosexual man?
Experience.
What is the difference between a rapist and a dictionary?
One of them knows the definition of no.
Asian pregnancy test: Stick a Rubik cube into vagina. Wait 30 seconds, if it's solved then there's a little Asian in there.
What's an emo's favorite Pink Floyd album?
The Final Cut.
- Mommy, I want a bicycle!
- Shut up, Sam! You've already got your wheelchair!
Friend: Hey, wanna play hide and seek? Me: Sure, I've got a great spot! Me: *grabs knife and runs to my closet*
What do you call a blind dinosaur? Do-you-think-he-saurus.
What do incest families do on Halloween?
Pumpkin.
What do five dicks sticking out of glory holes and five udders both have in common? They are ready for milking.
Why is Donald Trump so jealous of Usain Bolt?
Because he successfully finished a race!
if you ask an artist how to commit suicide, they will say a very creative way
Why is the leaning tower of Pizza leaning?
It has better reflexes than the twin towers.
If a woman sleeps with 10 men she's a slut, but if a man does it... He's gay, definitely gay.
In Soviet Russia, gay sex gets you arrested.
In America, getting arrested gets you gay sex.
Lmao, idiots don't know how to play Jenga.
I'd hit you, but I don't want to go to jail for animal abuse.