Short jokes
Q: What did one emo kid say to the other emo kid?
A: Wanna hang out?
1273. Depression got the best of me. I'm gonna cry in my room now.
What is the difference between a rapist and a dictionary?
One of them knows the definition of no.
Friend: Hey, wanna play hide and seek? Me: Sure, I've got a great spot! Me: *grabs knife and runs to my closet*
What's an emo's favorite Pink Floyd album?
The Final Cut.
Asian pregnancy test: Stick a Rubik cube into vagina. Wait 30 seconds, if it's solved then there's a little Asian in there.
- Mommy, I want a bicycle!
- Shut up, Sam! You've already got your wheelchair!
playing irl fruit ninja on my arm.
Why is the leaning tower of Pizza leaning?
It has better reflexes than the twin towers.
When you're fighting with the emo kid and he brings his friends. Now you gotta fight the suicide squad.
What do white people and fences have in common? They both get jumped by Mexicans.
In Soviet Russia, gay sex gets you arrested.
In America, getting arrested gets you gay sex.
Gays: "I like men."
Straight: "I like women."
Bisexual: "A hole is a hole."
Why do people in Alabama always swipe left on Tinder?
Because they aren't family!
Why can a gay man give a better brojob to a heterosexual man than another heterosexual man?
Experience.
What do you call a blind dinosaur? Do-you-think-he-saurus.
Why is Donald Trump so jealous of Usain Bolt?
Because he successfully finished a race!
What kind of experience does a feminist have?
Being a bitch.
What do five dicks sticking out of glory holes and five udders both have in common? They are ready for milking.
Woah man, you need to take a step back. Your hairline did, so I am sure you can.