Short jokes
She asked me if I was hung like a horse, but I said no.
I'm hung like a person who wants to die, but then the rope broke.
Say what you want about Jeffery Dahmer, but he always managed to get a head.
What did the priest say when he walked into an elementary school?
Let us prey.
Putin: You came from the West and showered me with gifts.
Trump: And your prostitutes, they showered me with piss.
Iran: Prepare the FINAL SOLUTION.
Israel: And you'll be telling the whole world, "I-RAN AWAY!"
Palestinians leave without saying goodbye.
Israel says goodbye when the Americans say so.
Americans leave without saying goodbye.
Russians say goodbye without leaving.
What is the best time to eat dinner?
When you're hungry.
Why did Severus Snape cross the road wearing an invisibility cloak?
So no one would know what side he was on.
I rule my women with an IRON FIST!!
Yeah, literally an iron that my fist is clenching against her face.
It's a Italy day outside the fields.
I got knob cheesed after your sexy mom was on top, dry humping me on the vanilla-coloured living room carpet.
I like my women how I like my bacon.
Well Dunn!!!
Once you've had the mother,
Don't tell me you've never been tempted to do the daughter.
Your mom was absolutely getting drilled by me on the living room floor last night.
🎵 BEAVER BEAVER 🎵
LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA
I'm walking down the street with a bag of dildos, beryllium, and a butt plug.
I like it when your mom keeps on top of things.
(Male fantasy)
Yeah, on top of me on the living room carpet, snogging my face off.
I was literally cradlesnatched as a child.
Yeah, in the arms of an older woman experiencing my first rounds of motorboating.
Your mom's ass is so petite and big, I'd pound that till the Earth shakes.
Your mom has quite the mouth on her.
As I found out last night. Oh, what a night!! 😏 😉 😜