Short jokes
Yo momma so dumb, she got kicked off the short bus.
I'm sure you could be the smartest person in your class.
If it were a class for the profoundly retarded.
Q. What's Terri Schiavo's favorite movie?
A. The Purge.
Q. Why aren't jokes about bulimia funny?
A. They're just in bad taste.
A fine is a tax for doing something wrong. A tax is a fine for doing something good.
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"Father replied, "I don't know, son. I'm still paying."
Anal intercourse is for assholes.
Y'know that foundation called "Autism Speaks"? No, it screeches.
I saw a cute coworker and had sex in the back until I realized it is a family business.
When your crush walks in class, but you're homeschooled...
I have a joke about suicide, but I’ll just let it hang.
A guy jumped out of the Twin Towers, saying, "I ordered pepperoni pizza, not a plane!"
Why don't amputees ever get cold? They're always wearing their stump warmers.
Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She was born without arms.
What's the difference between a hipster and a hockey player? A hockey player changes his pads every third period.
If you think I would joke about Alzheimer's, forget it.
Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs?
So you can tell them apart from the feminists.
Why do lesbians get their belly button pierced?
So they have a place to hang the air freshener.
Why do men fart louder than women?
Because women can’t keep their mouth shut to build up any pressure.
What is the first thing you would do if you woke up as a woman?
"Probably the dishes."