Short jokes
One day my girlfriend and I were just hanging out and she needed to tell our dad that we were going out.
What do you call your sister who only has one leg?
Ei-lean.
When Steven Hawking realizes heaven is only a stairway away.
Why didn’t the orphan celebrate their birthday?
Because they didn’t have a mom to birth them.
Why does Royal Cola have more royalty than a queen?
Answer: It tastes better.
What did the letter A say to the letter B?
"Z" you later.
My father can take a joke because he made one.
I never feel offended if my friends don't wish me a happy birthday.
Because that's what I want.
What type of implants are at a Chinese dentist office? Buck teeth implants.
What does a cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?
He wipes his butt.
Q. What's the difference between my phone battery and an anti-vax kid?
A. Nothing, they both die at ten.
What is 1 + 1?
They didn’t tell me. Their stomach is upset.
I told her "I love you." She said, "I love me too."
Yo mama so fat, she stand on the scale and the scale says: "I want your weight, not your phone number!"
a
How do people with hydrocephalus wear standard-size helmets?
L: you
You: 😂
What do you call a prostitute with no arms or legs?
Cash and carry.
The village people said that they need their idiot back; you better get going!
You know what's the worst about having a daughter with cancer?
You can't pull her hair when you hit it from the back.