Shes jokes

Your mum was so poor that she went to rob the bank, but she left because she couldn't find the cameras. She left her son, and the security [girl] gave him the camera.

Yo mama so stupid, she brought weed to the highway. Then she realized, "I'm not stupid, I was just high as a bitch." She just got fucked so hard by her man, she thought she was high.

Why did Kristen Stewart fart on the set of Charlie's Angels? Because she ate too much damn chili for breakfast I made for her. I just forgot to put my foot in it.

Yo Mama so fat, she has a Twinkie inside of a Twinkie inside of her fat ass motherfucking belly button!

Your mama is so skinny that when she went to go outside, the slightest breeze flew her all the way to New Mexico.

If her internal clock can tock, she can sit on my cock.

If her internal clock can tick, she can sit on my dick.

Yo mama so fat, she got arrested for carrying 10 pounds of CRACK.

Me and my friends were talking. Then we started talking about our wives. I said, "So, I married a volcano for a wife. You never know when she will blow up."

Why does my cheating ex-wife wear a colostomy bag?

She lost her ass playing poker...

Why did Sally fall off the swing?

She has no arms.

What's the best thing about taking a shower with a 12 year old Philippino girl?

If you slick her hair back, she looks 10.

My wife found a rock and asked if it was expensive, and I said it "leavarite". She said, "Is that expensive?" and I told her, "Leave it right there."

What did Stephen Hawking's wife say to him when he came home drunk?

Nothing... she couldn't tell.

Your mama so fat, she filled up Minecraft's block limit! lol XD

There is a young lady.

She is beautiful.

She got much vote.

But she speaks very fast.

Does she think she looks smart doing that?

She makes me feel bad.

Why did ze cow cross the road?

yo watch his mum getting butchered she was an udder failure.

Jake grabbed Lina's thigh and said, "Why don't we have sex? I really wanna see your boobs. I bet they're hot." "Yeah, they are." She took her clothes off and he saw her body. "OMG GODDESS OF BOOBS, PUSSYS AND BUTT LETS HAVE SEX LOOK AT MY..." HE WOKE UP THEN CRIED AND KISSED HIS SISTER'S BUTT. SHE SMACKED HIM THEN HE TOOK HER TO HIS BASEMENT AND KILLED HER FROM SEX.

Why couldn't the girl brush her hair?

..... She had cancer.... ;)

A man told his love interest she looked beautiful.

And then his love interest told him she had loads of things to tell him.

And after 3 minutes, she told him he looked fat, ugly, disgusting, creepy, and tiny.

Then the police came and arrested her for saying that.