She Jokes

Mama

Your mama is so ugly that when she walked in the bank, they had to turn off the cameras.

Fetus

A 14 year old girl finds out she is pregnant. Her: "Crap! My mom is going to kill me!"

The fetus: "lol same here."

Momma

Your momma is so ugly, the director thought she was a real zombie.

Queen

Why did Queen Elizabeth the II die?

Because she ran out of immortali-tea.

Run

I was walking this hot girl home, then she noticed me, then the walk turned into a run.

Queen

What do you call the longest reigning monarch?

The queen? No, she dead.

Yo mama

Yo mama so fat, she was pulled over... FOR HAVING 12 POUNDS OF CRACK ON HER!

Mum

Your mum is so fat, she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.

Exam

Today, I had an exam in school. When I was done, I raised my hand and yelled, “Pisstiano Penaldo!”

My teacher smiled and took my paper. She knew I was finished.

Mama

Well, yo mama is fat, and when she loses weight, all the food that she has is hers, but the Africans get none.

Sex

My wife says sex is even better on holiday. I wish she didn’t tell me via email.

Mama

Yo mama so fat that when she went to take a crap... she couldn't even take a crap!

Wife

Tony's wife got a divorce from Tony. She said she wanted to be an independent woman.

Days later, Tony's wife had an accident. Guess who's crawling back for help. 💀

Leprechaun

Yesterday on the school bus my friend in front of me said she was 41% Irish and 15% Mexican.

Then my friend sitting next to me said, “Wow, almost half leprechaun!”

Then I said, “Yeah, and 15 percent wall climber!”

Orphan

Friend: Hi, orphan.

Orphan: Tell me a yo momma joke.

Friend: ummm

Orphan: Exactly, U can't.

Friend: Yo momma so disappointed she left!

Stalker

So today I heard a friend say she had a stalker. I can confirm I've never seen a stalker following her.