Sexuality jokes
How do you play chess with a Catholic?
You put a condom on the bishop.
Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
A. Ask your mother.
You're gay.
Bro, I am straighter than the pole that your mom dances on for me every night.
What is the difference between gross and kinky according to a Canadian?
Using a toothpick to remove human feces between your teeth after licking another person's ass is gross, but performing a blowjob on a man who is well-endowed while he is eating a tuna fish sandwich, with maple syrup instead of mayonnaise, is kinky.
This is not a joke, Tom. I'm asking you to leave me alone, stop being sexual, I don't like you.
Sike, I lied. I like big black men.
Two deer walk out of a gay bar. One of them turns to the other and says, "I can't believe I blew forty bucks in there."
Did you guys see on the news where they arrested that pervert at the Michaels Crafts store?
He was running around completely naked and had sprinkled glitter all over his testicles. I guess it was pretty nuts.
Mpreg is hot af.
I love jacking off to mpreg.
How do you tell whether you’ve satisfied a redhead?
She unlocks the handcuffs.
Why do heterosexual men and heterosexual women believe that bisexual men don't exist because male bisexuality doesn't exist? Because it doesn't cycle 🚲.
What is the difference between a microwave and a gay guy?
A microwave doesn’t brown your meat.
BLM.
Biden Loves Bisexuality.
Are you a hotdog stand? 'Cause you make my hotdog stand ;)
What do you call an anorexic girl with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese.
What do you call ten lesbians in a room together? Fingerhut.
What do you call two lesbians in a closet together? A liquor cabinet.
What do you call a room full of 50 lesbians and fifty congressmen? 100 people who don't do dick.
Why don't women wear miniskirts in the winter? 'Cause they would get chapped lips.
What do a cliff jumper and a gay man have in common? If the rubber breaks, they're in deep shit.
What do you get when you cross a lesbian that is a feminazi, a lesbian that is a progressive democrat, a promiscuous woman that is a lesbian prostitute working inside a lesbian brothel in San Francisco, California, and one of Jehovah's Witnesses?
You gay.
Are you gay? "No." Oh, so you're not happy? "No." Oh...
Joe Biden is the first president in history to have a vice president on record claiming they believed sexual harassment allegations against him.
I don't know about you, but I think that's a pretty big elephant in the room!
Okay, what do you call that purple thing in your mom's top dresser drawer that she calls her best best friend for some weird reason?
Dad better look out from Bob, battery-operated boyfriend, hahaha!