Self

Self Jokes

Scan

What's something a depressed person can do that a regular person can't?

The depressed person can scan themself.

self-checkout

I went to self-checkout at a store and I scanned my products, but the scanner wouldn't scan the barcode on my arm.

Loss

Pov:You start writing son lyrics because you can't stand up for yourself knowing you've lost

The image is a screenshot of a post on worstjokesever.com, displaying a conversation thread with several comments. It includes comments like 'Congratulations. No one gives a shit', 'Feeling right, looking tight. Come get the drinking shots on the rocks' and 'Ofc you're using song lyrics because you can't talk for yourself'.

Love

I was making love to this girl, and she started crying. I said, “Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?” She said, “No, I hate myself now.”

– Rodney Dangerfield

Pizza

Did you hear they made an Emo-Hipster pizza?

It cuts itself, and you're supposed to eat it before it's cool.

Library

I went to a library and I started to make fun of a disabled guy. He started crying, and I said, "Stand up for yourself!"

Wheelchair

Why do people in wheelchairs get bullied? Because they can never stand up for themselves.

Player

Among Us players after saying "Self Report!" to the police officers who find a dead body in their basement.

Furry

I told a furry, "Don't call yourself a joke!" I said to the furry, "Joke has meanings."

Emo

What do you say when an emo cuts themself?

"Like your cut, G."