See Jokes

There were these two guys in a lunatic asylum... and one night, they decide they don't like living in an asylum anymore. They decide they're going to escape!

So, like, they get up onto the roof, and there, just across this narrow gap, they see the rooftops of the town, stretching away in the moonlight... stretching away to freedom. Now, the first guy, he jumps right across with no problem. But his friend, his friend didn't dare make the leap. You see... You see, he's afraid of falling.

So then, the first guy has an idea... He says "Hey! I have my flashlight with me! I'll shine it across the gap between the buildings. You can walk along the beam and join me!" B-but the second guy just shakes his head. He suh-says... He says "Wh-what do you think I am? Crazy? You'd turn it off when I was half way across!"

Magician: "I am the greatest magician in the whole world. Look, now you see the rabbit in the hat, and now it is gone!"

Redneck girl: "That's nothing. My dad is the greatest magician! He disappears for a whole year and reappears at Christmas for a couple of hours!"

I threw a dodgeball at a blind kid and got him out... guess I can say he didn't see it coming!

Troll your friend by saying "I" and saying "cup," and then tell them that that means "I see you pee."

LOL

There is also "lettuce cup," which means "let us see you pee."

You're so fat, you drank an invisibility potion, and everyone could still see you!

godd

The image is split into two sections. The top part shows two cartoon penguins looking straight ahead with blank expressions. A translucent image of one penguin is layered on top of the other. The caption above reads: "Me zoned out staring at a fixed point:". The bottom part shows a boy holding up a wooden cross and raising one hand in a defensive gesture. His expression is one of surprise and mild fear. The caption above the boy reads: "The ghost in my room:". The captions around the boy read: "How the flip can u see me?!" and "U need God".

Your hairline is so far back, I couldn't see you even when Will Smith slapped it.

Stupid Mary Jane was swinging on the swing.

Her momma said, "Stupid Mary Jane, don't swing so high, the boys will see your underwear!"

Stupid Mary Jane laughed and laughed. She knew she wasn't wearing no underwear.

Cashew, see, I'm nuts about you!?

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

IBC.

IBC who?

I'll be seeing you later.

Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street when all of a sudden, Paddy falls down a manhole. Murphy shouts down, "Paddy, is it dark down there?"

Paddy shouts up, "Dunno Murphy, I crnt see a fecking thing!"

A B C D E F G H I see a bitch in front of me.

It's kinda sad seeing you attempt to put your whole vocabulary in one sentence. Oh wait, you only said three words.

I saw a kid crying and asked him where his parents were. He started crying harder.

The ungrateful brat. I see why he is an orphan.

Yo hairline so bad when people see it, they turn to stone.

I don’t see why people say that emo kids don’t like to hangout. I seen them hanging all day.

A dog walked into a tavern and said, “I can’t see a thing. I’ll open this one.” The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.