Astronomers got tired of watching the moon rotate around the earth for 24 hours, so they just called it a "day".
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He lost internet connection.
Is it just me, or are magnets really attractive?
Two men walked into a bar, and one man asked for H20, and the other man asked for H20 too.
Only one man came out alive.
They found water on Mars. Mars:1 Africa:0
What do you get when you put a suicide bomber in a wheel chair? An RC-XD.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Orphans don't get picked.
Why can't Stephen Hawking be a Rocket League car? Because he can't jump for an aerial.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo? Heads and Shoulders?
Flat Earthers
Why does the nucleus feel trapped?
Because itโs inside a cell!
How did Stephen Hawking die?
They unplugged the wifi.
What do you get when you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the petting zoo!
Why was Stephen Hawking's wife mad at him?
She caught him having an affair with his shoulder.
I found out what DNA stands for. It's the National Dyslexic's Association.
Scientists say I'm made up of 75% of water.
But after jumping in the ocean, it's 100%, just like my depression.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because he lost Wi-Fi connection.
I'm not saying you're inbred. I'm just saying you're a textbook example of why consanguineous marriage might not be the best idea.
Theory is when you know everything but nothing works.
Practice is when everything works but no one knows why.
In our lab, theory and practice are combined: Nothing works and no one knows why.
Did you know there are black holes billions of years old?
Whatโs more amazing is the black holes Stephen Hawking studied. We're only 14 years old.
The only thing flat earthers have to fear...
... is a sphere itself.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite toy?
Hot Wheels.
