Science jokes
What do you call a modern-day plague doctor? A COVID doctor.
One day, the teacher asks a boy, "Why can't fish talk underwater?"
The kid says, "If I put your head underwater, will you be able to talk?"
"Is your refiger running?"
"Is your refrigerator running? You better go catch it!"
How do you communicate to the dead?
Jump up and down on the ground and speak in Morse code!
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite toy as a kid?
Hot Wheels.
Poop fell off the earth.
Q. What's the difference between my phone battery and an anti-vax kid?
A. Nothing, they both die at ten.
What is the difference between Stephen Hawking and a walkie-talkie? He doesn't walkie or talkie.
Stephen Hawking went bankrupt after he found out somebody in his house was costing him way too much money on electricity bills.
He just couldn’t figure out who.
What is Stephen Hawking's mum?
Your mum!
Why did people bully the burning circuit?
It was too short.
EMMETT BROWN IS FAT.
What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and a walkie talkie? He can’t walkie or talkie.
What does an astronaut call his ex from space?
SpaceX.
🚘 What is as old as the earth 🌎 and new every month? The moon.
A broken pencil tried to break the laws of physics. It wasn't very sharp.
Why do science jokes usually get no reaction?
Because they're so boron!
Stephen Hawking walked in a bar...
Just kidding.
As a scientist, I confirm that you speak too fast. It has a speed of 1 bullshit per second.
Why is mercury like everything else in the world?
Because it gives you cancer.