Science

Science Jokes

Dead

How do you communicate to the dead?

Jump up and down on the ground and speak in Morse code!

Toy

What was Stephen Hawking's favorite toy as a kid?

Hot Wheels.

Kid

Q. What's the difference between my phone battery and an anti-vax kid?

A. Nothing, they both die at ten.

Stephen Hawking

Stephen Hawking went bankrupt after he found out somebody in his house was costing him way too much money on electricity bills.

He just couldn’t figure out who.

Moon

🚘 What is as old as the earth 🌎 and new every month? The moon.

Pencil

A broken pencil tried to break the laws of physics. It wasn't very sharp.

Bullshit

As a scientist, I confirm that you speak too fast. It has a speed of 1 bullshit per second.

Mercury

Why is mercury like everything else in the world?

Because it gives you cancer.

Hide-and-seek

Why did Stephen Hawking stop playing hide and seek with his wife?

She kept getting the metal detector out.