School

School jokes

Laptop

Am I the only one who's on here because it's not blocked on the school laptop and I can't use my phone in class?

Cows go moo.

Color

If you're going shopping at school, what color would I like to smell: True or False?

Hitler

Someone at my school the other day said that whoever killed Hitler was a hero. Who's going to tell him?

Name

My sister's name was Philma. We were unfortunate enough to have the last name Coochie. Let's just say no more virgins were at that school.

Memes

Drug

What’s the difference between drugs and kids?

I don’t do drugs.

Essay

How did the Mexican girl get pregnant? Her teacher told her to do his essay.

Friend

So I was on a Discord call the other day, and one of my friends, an American buddy, joined, and we had a conversation.

Until they said: "When did pounds change to quid?"

And I said: "They're the exact same thing."

Then they said: "But when did it happen?"

So I said: "When did school change to shooting range?"

Orphan

Orphans can get away with anything really bad at school, because they can't be sent home for it.

Orphan

Why did the orphan cry when the teacher yelled at him?

Because the teacher said, "Don't make me call your parents!"

Rule

Grandpa said, "No phone near the table," so I said, "You're not allowed near the school."

Pedophile

Him: *slowly drives past elementary school while looking at kids*

Her: Why are you staring at those kids? *jokingly* Are you like a pedophile or something?

Him: ... At least you know why I love calling you "baby" now~

Homework

What does a chicken give you?

Student: Meat.

What does a pig give you?

Student: Bacon.

What does a fat cow give you?

Student: Homework.

Magazine

Me: Hey, that's a really heavy bag, do you have a lot of books and magazines in there?

The Quiet Kid: Yeah, magazines.....

Orphan

I copied my friend's work. It's not like the teacher can tell my parents.