Who’s more excited than a kid on his birthday?
Jimmy Savile in a primary school playground.
School Jokes
I asked my teacher if I needed to be in the special ED class, but she said I don’t eat enough vegetables.
Why do special ed classes have fans?
To keep the vegetables nice and fresh.
Teacher: What's your favorite animal?
Me: Desert Eagle.
Teacher: Why?
Me: 'Cause it fits in my backpack.
What couldn’t the boy in the wheelchair do when he saw a bully? He couldn’t stand up for himself.
Why did the teacher get the death penalty? Because she gave an orphan homework. That's on period. #darkhumor
Why did the fastest cat get kicked out of school?
He was a cheetah.
Toto is at school and asks if he can go to the bathroom. The teacher says no.
Then, she asks Toto, “Where is the biggest river in the world?”
“Under my bench,” he replies.
So, I was in school, and there was a number saying "696969," so I said to my mother, "What does it mean?" She said, "Your fucking dad and I!"
The depressed kid getting bullied.
The bully: "You are useless."
The depressed kid: "I know."
Teacher: Everyone, tomorrow is bring your mom to school day.
Me: Sorry but my mom's not gonna make it.
Teacher: Why?
Me: I'm an orphan, bitch.
Teacher: This assignment is big.
Student (male): I have something that's big.
Teacher: Yeah, your forehead.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other side.
Why did the teacher get arrested?
He gave the orphan homework!
Teachers at a school shooting be like: damn it. That's the third one this week and it's only Monday.
A: Why did the orphan not come to school today?
B: Because today we had a parent meetup.
Whoever invented school, I hope you burn in hell.
A teacher asked her class “what is sex?”
Little Johnny got up and said: “Sex is a *temptation* Caused by a *sensation* Where the boy sticks his *location* Into a girls *destination* To increase the *population* Of the next *generation* Did you get my *explanation*? Or do you need a *demonstration*?”
The teacher faints.
Kid: "THERE'S A SHOOTER IN THE BUILDING!"
Shooter: "Oops."
Why did the school go remote?
Because the teachers wanted to play with remotes!
