New Ruler Jokes

I am your leader.

Which school supply is king of the classroom? A ruler

The Ruler of Varvona wanted a fruitcake, but his subjects showed up at his castle with a Christian instead.

And he said: "NO, NO, NO! YOU IMBECILES! NOT THAT KIND OF FRUITCAKE!"

Your hairline so far back I use it as a ruler to measure things

Your mama is so stupid that she put a ruler under her pillow to see how long she slept.

What's one piece of stationary gay kids always forget to bring to school? A ruler.

As ruler of a kingdom, I wanted a knight. Duke Leo Pessi IV offered himself but wanted a wife in return. I offered my beautiful daughter to him. However, he slapped her and proceeded to wreck my castle. All this whilst crying “I don’t want princess, I want farmer!”

DAMN YOU PESSI!

One day at school little Jhonny was not listening so the teacher came up to him teacher: at the end of this ruler is someone dumb ,little Jhonny: miss which end where you referring to?

Who is king of the pencils?

The ruler!

Teacher: At the end of this ruler is an idiot.

Student: Which end?

What's the easiest way to get straight A's? Use a ruler.

few jokes (sorry if they have already been used.) 1 I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me. 2 Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he always has a great fall. 3 Have you heard the one about the skunk? Never mind, it really stinks. 4 It's always windy in a sports arena. All those fans. 5 What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course! 6 Comic Sans walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your type here." 7 What's the easiest way to get straight As? Use a ruler. 8 Why were they called the Dark Ages? Because there were lots of knights

yo mama so dumb she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept

Who was purple and wanted to rule the world?

Alexander the Grape.

Cesar: What was that good salad called? Servant: Ceaser, Cesar. Cesar: Okay, what's going to be the weather like? Servant: Hail, Cesar Cesar: yes I know Hail Cesar but I need to know what the weathers like! Servant: Well its hail, Cesar. Cesar: AHHHHH! Send him to the DUNGEONS! NOW!