The definition of a stalker is two people going on a romantic walk but only one person knows about it.
My girlfriend asked me to write her a poem for Valentines Day: Roses are red, Watches are gold. Get on your knees, And do as you're told.
me: i'm going to steal your heart
her: omg thats so romantic!!
me, an organ trafficker: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don't find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.
I like my dates like I like my wine...
Locked in a cellar and aged for 12 years.
There was this kid who was going to take a girl to the dance. He had fancy clothes, fancy shoes, etc. Finally, the day of the dance came. He happily drove over to the girl's house. When he got there, he said to her father “thank you for this moment, have a great night”. At the dance, the girl asks the boy, “can I have some food?” He gladly replies “yes” and walks over to the food trucks, only to see a huge line. So he waits in line for like 30 minutes. He comes back to the girl, and she says, “thank you so much, I really needed something to eat”. Then she asks for some sweets and a soda. Again the boy waits in line for about 30-45 minutes. Then he comes back, and she says, “thank you SOOOO much” Then she says she has one more request. The boy, (now clearly agitated) says, “what is it?” She says, can I have some punch? SO the boy walks over to the punch table, but to his surprise, there was no punch line.
If i send a clown to deliver flowers to my wife...
...is that a romantic jester
When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don’t find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.
What does a Chinese guy say to his lover? “You’re the ying to my yang”!
Rose are red balls are round skirts are up painties are down belly to belly skin to skin when its stiff stick it in.
Gwen if ur reading this the link I sent is for u and ur bf to chat and stuff no one shall bother u! Pinky pinky! Btw do U know how I am cause if do then I am related to kenya and my name starts with T? Don't worry just chat with ur boy friend
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Bro i saw two dudes kissing LOL but not regular kissing
Dating 101
Heres what you do:
1. Dinner 2. Kiss 3. Movie 4. Sex 5. Bring her back home 6. Get paid 15 bucks for babysitting
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
What’s the difference between a loser and a paper? A girl actually dates the paper.
The woman became extremely uncomfortable with the man she had just met. While he lay beside her, romantically kissing and stroking her neck he whispered “I called the number you gave me at the bar tonight. Someone named Alvin answered who has never heard of you.”
roses are red, violets are blue, I'll be the dolphin, you can be the jellyfish
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
