My water was leaking, so I used Flex Tape. Now I don't know where to shower. Thanks, Phil!
My water was leaking, so I used Flex Tape. Now I don't know where to shower.
A couple is sitting down, holding hands, and having a picnic after their wedding when the husband's friend walks over and says,
"Jenny and Jonathan sittin' in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes abrupt, tragic miscarriage! Then comes blame. Then comes despair, two hearts damaged, beyond repair. Johnathan leaves Jenny, and writes on the tree: D-I-V-O-R-C-E."
What did the mechanic say to the other mechanic when he broke the car?
"How will we wrench ourselves out of this?"
What do you do with a broken bird? You re-parrot!
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Slap it on the arse and tell it to keep going!
Where do you take Stephen Hawking when he dies?
The Apple repair store.
Who did Stephen call when he crashed?... The geek squad.
Why do y’all call a pickup truck?
'Cause ya got a flat tire.
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?
Hit your wife harder.
What does a broken down vegetable say?
I need new wheels.
