Religion jokes

Hi! Could I join?

Your hairline looks like the stairway to hell.

Bent and far back.

What does the Catholic Church and Worstjokesever.com have in common?

They're both full of child groomers.

Guys, this is so disrespectful, I love Jesus. I go to church every Tuesday morning to give Jesus a... giffffffft.

So disrespectful guys. #jesusismyhubby

I still don't know what's the worst, most dangerous place to take your children on holiday, but, for certain, it's either Vatican City or Neverland Ranch.

Why did Technoblade die?

Because God wished him dead for all the orphans he made fun of.

Come, my children, to the bread cult!

Why did Jesus come back from the dead? He forgot to tell you that you're gay!

It's important to wash your sex toys.

That's why priests invented baptism.

Did Jesus die a virgin?

Nah, he got nailed...

Jesus and Moses come back to Earth.

Moses says, "Let's go down to the ocean and see if I can do what I used to when I was here before." So Moses raises his arms and motions to part the waters. Sure enough, he is able to part the waters just as before.

Jesus quips, "Close the water, I'm going to try to do what I used to when I was here last." So Jesus walks out on top of the water, then sinks to the bottom. He crawls out pulling seaweed off of him. Moses says, "Hey, it's not your fault, you didn't have those holes in your feet before."

What did God say to the black person?

"Oops, I burned one."😳

Not racist, just funny.

I'm still wondering who took Jesus' sandals.

Even the one who ate that dove that sat at Jesus' shoulder. 🤔

I am sure this was the type of economy Judas Iscariot was in when he betrayed Jesus.

Your hairline is so far away that Jesus could've seen it when he was on the cross.

Looking out for becoming a pilot, can y'all suggest some good mosques?

Don't want to learn the landing part, though, Allah said it's unnecessary.

Finally, some social platform where you can talk about Muslims and not get bombed.

Obv, unless you share your residence.

Your mom is so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he asked your mom to move out of the way.

YOOO, does anyone need an ark? I know a guy!

Why are Demons dying from Priestwater? The soul from a Priest is completely different.