Questions jokes

Parent

  • What is the most annoying thing your parents say to you, and what is the dumbest thing someone can say that annoys you?

    The most annoying thing your parents can say: "Finish your dinner, there are starving kids in Africa!" No, you can't have any dessert until you finish your dinner. (See how annoying that is!)

    The dumbest thing someone can say that annoys you: "Why is your name Crayla? Why is your last name Goldburg? Is it like a gold bird!" (That is really annoying if you ask me!)

    Thanks for reading this...bye!

    Kid

  • Yesterday I had a party in my basement.

    I got questioned a lot about 5 dead kids in the corner shut in a box. I did that when I was 13, damn I forgot about them!

    Mirror

  • At the job interview, they asked me, “Where do you see yourself in five years?”

    I told him, “I think we’ll still be using mirrors in five years.”

    Classroom

  • There are two kids sitting in a classroom: Lily and John. Lily sleeps in class every day.

    The teacher asks Lily who made heaven and earth. John pokes her with a pencil. She shouts, "Jesus Christ Almighty!"

    The teacher says, "That's right."

    The teacher says the next day she asks the same question. John pokes her with a pencil. She shouts, "Jesus Christ Almighty!"

    "That's right," the teacher says.

    The next day she asks Lily what did Eve say to Adam after their 100th. John pokes her again. "If you stick that thing in me one more time, I'mma break it in half!" she shouts.

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  • Pussy

  • What does pussy taste like in chocolate cream pie?

    Don't ever ask me no damn question like that. I ain't never had no damn chocolate cream pie, you crazy?

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  • Driving Test

  • Sara's Mom was helping her prepare for her driver's test.

    Mom: "Okay, any questions?"

    Sara: "Yes. I actually don't know what "yield" means."

    Mom: "Don't worry, Hon. No one does."

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  • Exam

  • There was an exam music quiz question about Gary Glitter. Now, if there's anyone you don't want to associate with the phrase "shh, turn over, you've got an hour," it's him.

    Shit, my bad. I should leave him alone, he just wants to settle down and have kids.

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  • Abortion

  • The daughter walks up to her father and asks him, "Dad, can I ask you something?"

    The father says, "Of course, what's your question?"

    The daughter replies and asks, "How do you feel about abortion?"

    The father says, "Why don't you ask your sister?"

    The daughter replies, "I don't have a sis-"

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  • Cookie

  • Jayden March, a name so bold, Never knew the joy of cookies untold. In a world of sugar and sweet delight, He stood apart, an unusual sight.

    While others indulged in sugary bliss, Jayden abstained, dismissing the kiss Of chocolate chips and dough so divine, His willpower strong, his resolve intertwined.

    No oatmeal raisin or double fudge, Could tempt his taste buds, not even a nudge. For Jayden March, a different path he took, In a world of cookies, he never partook.

    His reasons unknown, a mystery untold, Perhaps he sought something purer than gold. Or maybe he craved a different kind of treat, One that couldn't be found in a cookie sheet.

    But as the years passed by, curiosity grew, Whispers of wonder, questions anew. Why did Jayden March deny such delight? Was there a secret hidden in his resolute fight?

    Some say he found solace in nature's embrace, In the rustle of leaves and the wind's gentle pace. Others believed his heart sought a different reward, In acts of kindness, love freely poured.

    Jayden March, a man of mystery and grace, Marched to a beat only he could embrace. In a world of cookies, he found his own way, Leaving us wondering, pondering day by day.

    For though he never tasted the sweetness of a treat, Jayden March's story remains incomplete. A reminder to us all, to explore and define, Our own desires, our own paths to find.

    So let us celebrate Jayden's unique choice, And listen to the whisper of our own inner voice. For in a world of cookies, may we remember, That sometimes it's the journey, not the taste, we treasure.

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  • Orphan

  • I asked an orphan where his mom was. He started crying, so I said it again.

    And well, that was my last day at the orphanage.

    Teacher

  • Chapter 1. "Kid teacher"

    Mrs. Lewis: Class, I want everyone to look at their textbooks and find a reasonable essay topic. My suggestion is page 232 or 678. Now, this essay counts as the final grade for the semester. Now do it, or you will repeat 5th grade again! Now turn to page 100, and we'll start reading from there. Do you all understand?

    Neilela: Yes ma'am, quick question, we don't have to do it today... do we?

    Mrs. Lewis: Yes! It is today!

    Andrua: It sounds boring, and all I have to do today is be a big jerk who gives way too much instruction.

    Mrs. Lewis: Anyway, let's get to work.

    56 hours later.

    Mrs. Lewis: Kids, when I call you, please tell me what you liked about your essay. When I call your name, Carl.

    Carl: Why me? Yes?

    Mrs. Lewis: What did you like about the story, Carl?

    Carl: Um... I liked it when... um... um... um... um...

    Jeklen: He didn't even read the story because he's too busy trying to look up the letter "J" and its meaning!

    Carl: Jeklen, shut up and stop biting your hair.

    Jeklen: At least I know what the letter "J" is.

    Mrs. Lewis: Class, please listen. Carl, did you read the story that I asked you?

    Carl: Well, not really because you were the one reading it in class, so...

    Vronica: For real!

    Carl: Mhmmm

    Mrs. Lewis: Listen class, this homework needs to be done today! DO IT!

    Kimbriel: Ms. Lewis, I have a lot of questions about tonight's homework.

    Mrs. Lewis: Yes?

    Kimbriel: You assigned so many things just for a little test! What?

    Mrs. Lewis: I need a break! Peyton, you're in charge!

    All students: NO, NOT PEYTON !!!!!!

    Peyton: Me? In charge? Of the class?

    Jessica: Wow, but you're all about the boredom!

    Peyton: Shut up! yeeeeeeee

    Peyton: Ms. Lewis, there must be a mistake, how can I be in charge? I'm 11... I think...

    Ari: To think that yesterday she thought she was 8 years old.

    Oh sorry... I think.

    Mrs. Lewis: Have you ever heard of a teacher's vacation?

    All students: That's not a thing!

    I never heard of it...

    Mrs. Lewis: Well, me and Ms. Sumrall, we are going on a "teacher vacation", we can do it because we become calmer, or we don't get angry at the students. AND WE CAN DO IT!

    Khloe: Why?

    Mrs. Lewis: Because I am an adult.

    Ms. Sumrall: Is Petrina ready?

    Ms. Lewis: Yes, thank goodness for this!

    Kenya: Bye? "Chapter 2" To be continued...

    Robot

  • What is one question on a tech test you should always ask before getting down?

    What in the Robot!?