Personal jokes
Who is the only person time waits for? Nun.
What do you call a Chinese person with no legs?
Lim Ping.
The only person I'd have a cooking lesson with is Hitler.
A fat person with autism is a bit like decent sunscreen... A broad spectrum.
What does the suicidal person say on New Years?
"New year, no me."
How do you make a sad person jump?
A bridge.
Stop it! What if a blind person sa- oh wait, never mind, carry on.
How do you restrain a straight person? Give them a straight jacket.
How do you restrain a trans person? Make the trans vest tight.
What do I call a white person with 15 black kids?
Coach.
My true hero is the person who killed Hitler.
What do you call a retarded person and a stroke victim in the same bed?
Mashed potatoes.
You: “Knock knock.” Person: “Who’s there?” You: “Leaf.” Person: “Leaf who?” You: “Leaf this house!”
*Apple bottom jeans plays*
What's the difference between a depressed person and a pizza? Pizza won't cut itself.
What do you call an autistic person with a driver's license?
A LETHAL WEAPON!
What do dark humor and a person with scoliosis have in common?
Both are sick and twisted.
Why is Hitler a better person than Jeffrey Epstein?
At least Hitler killed himself.
Q. What do you call a person with Alzheimer's?
It doesn't matter. They'll forget what you said in thirty seconds anyway.
How come you never see a gay person in a wheelchair?
It’s hard to be a fruit, when you’re already a vegetable.
What do you call a rich Chinese person? Cha-ching!
Ask Siri what rich North Koreans are there.
Siri: "I could not find anything for this question."
Do you ever look at a person and think, "Just how many generations of inbreeding did it take to create you?"