Your hairline is back, people say. "Look at this dude."
People Jokes
There were 5 people on an airplane.
1. The pilot 2. The businessman 3. The Minister 4. The school child 5. The Smartest person in the world
The plane takes off, a good, solid 1 hour in. The pilot comes out and says, "OK guys, I have good news and bad news."
"Bad News is the plane is gonna crash. The good news is that I have 4 parachutes."
The pilot says to his passengers, "Well I'm a pilot, I fly planes. People depend on me!" Took a parachute and went out.
The businessman stands up and says, "Well I'm a businessman, I run companies!" Took a parachute and went out.
The smartest person in the world stands up and says, "I'm the smartest person in the world. No one is smarter than me!" Took a parachute and went out.
Now the minister says to the school child, "Well God has given me a good life. I want you to take the last parachute," and the school child has a massive smile on her face and starts laughing all of the sudden and the minister says, "Why are you smiling?! We're about to die!!!!"
And the school child says to the minister, "Well actually [we're] not gonna die because there are still 2 parachutes left because the smartest person in the world just took my school bag!"
I bet emo girls get jealous when people cut paper.
If you think your life is bad, then people are discussing the gender of Mr. Potato Head.
I'm gonna finally put a stop to the fucking drama. I saw people bullying other people for years; Gwen was not the only one. No longer will I put up with this. No longer will newcomers. For God's sake, just do jokes! Please! If you want to bully someone, do it in your family! You people don’t even know each other, but we're still going through this same fucking shit every fucking day! Just make jokes, people! That is why it’s called “Worst Jokes ever” not “Bully people forever.” So shut the hell up and get to joking! Jesus! The only reason why I came here was to spread jokes and kindness like Gwen and others, not to spread hate and foolishness from people who don’t even know better things to do but to hate on stupid strangers from different parts of the fucking world!!!
“Addison, fuck off already, you're only 10 years old. What do you know?” I might be 10, but during my time here, the tragedies and horror I've experienced on this website have shaped me into someone more mature, able to share this wisdom. And if you're gonna laugh at me, spit in the face of me and my generous teachings, you will fall. I swear to God, I will make you wish you could never feel pain. But that would hurt me more than you. Please, stop the drama. That's all I ask. Together, we can make this website great again, like it once was.
Your mum... payed other people to take you!!!!
I sat down and reminisced about the past. I remembered all the people I've lost along the way.
Maybe becoming a tour guide wasn't a good idea.
Some people say I'm rude, but I think I'm pretty nice because the other day I saw this kid crying on the road and I asked him where his parents were. I just love looking at an orphanage.
Why are fat people fat? Because they eat like Indians eating curry, except fat people eat many more portions.
What is the difference between white people and Africans? The white people watch "The Hunger Games," the Africans live it.
What's the difference between white people and Africans?.... The white people get water.
People trying to stop me from being depressed: “Just cheer up!”
Me: “WOW, I NEVER THOUGHT OF THAT!”
In Ohio, people walk with their hands.
What brands do people in wheelchairs wear?
Michelin.
You have thin feet that people think you were a duck.
12 people on Let's Gooooo.
Why would a cannibal stop eating people?
If they got fed up with them.
Emos are weird to me because they dress up all black, and you know I don't like that, so that's why I don't like it.
Why can't people in wheelchairs be gay? Cuz you can't be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.
Who said white people can't jump?
Look at the footage from 9/11.
