Parademic jokes
In Africa, a koala and a kangaroo were very thirsty. The kangaroo said that when they have no water, they dig a hole and water comes out of it. Then the kangaroo dug, and in one minute the koala asked if there was any water. The kangaroo said no, and the koala had to wait for many minutes. Soon water came out of the hole, and then the koala jumped into the hole and drank water. The kangaroo wanted water too, so he tried to pull out the koala, but instead, his tail got chopped off, and then they never became friends again.
"Roses are red, Shut up and go to bed!"
What do squirrels eat at the fair? A-corn dog.
Once a monkey lived in a jamun tree. His friend, a crocodile, came there to eat jamun everyday. The second day, he ate some jamun and left some for his wife. Soon, his wife said, "Why don't you kill this monkey?"
The crocodile was sad and then asked the monkey to come to his place. The monkey said, "What if I drown?" The crocodile said, "Jump on my back." The monkey jumped on his back. The crocodile soon said, "I am gonna kill you. My wife is sick and wants to eat your heart." The monkey said, "I left my heart on the jamun tree." Then the crocodile swam back to the jamun tree and the monkey jumped on the tree.
You can assume a horse is called a great jumper when the horse’s name is “Polo Neck”.
What do you call an angry nut with a mustache?
A pistachio.
Which nut is the best at playing tag?
Catch-yous, aka cashews.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Cash.
Cash who?
No thanks, I prefer walnuts!
What kind of nuts come in cans?
Creamed a-corn.
I’d tell you a secret about peanut butter, but you might spread it.
I have a pun, but I will nut tell you!
A farmer had a donkey and a dog. One night, he was getting robbed by a thief. The donkey told the dog to bark, but the dog refused. So the donkey brayed very loudly, and the thief ran out of the house, and the farmer beat up the donkey.
Where do squirrels go for fun?
The acorn-ival.
U u u u u u I haveggdvk hey apple.
The peanut gained confidence and finally came out of its shell.
What happens to a nervous nut?
It cracks.
A mouse said, "Who should put the bell on the cat?" Then all mice said, "The old one."
What happened to the man who turned into a pistachio?
He became a shell of who he once was.
"Dog the dog" and Maggie were frightened of her, and the kangaroo said that she had to be in a hospital with a doctor. Jokes and Maggie were walking. I was going to go off the road to the city hall to see her, and I said that the only one-piece dress for women readymade RB collection, as he was walking in the city, and Maggie was a little bit more on the side of it.
The woman became extremely uncomfortable with the man she had just met. While he lay beside her, romantically kissing and stroking her neck he whispered, “I called the number you gave me at the bar tonight. Someone named Alvin answered who has never heard of you.”