Parademic jokes
Can I ask you a question? Nut now!
Who named their daughter Macadamia?
A couple of nuts.
Which nut is worth the most? A cashew.
What eats nuts and bolts? A squirrel that’s running late!
Happy was a cute hippo.
Happy sleeps in the water.
Happy walks on land.
Happy runs on Savannahs.
Happy swims in mud.
Happy takes a bath.
Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you!
What sandwich spread makes people itch?
Flea-nut butter.
Did you hear the one about the pecan, the walnut, and the cashew?
It was nut funny.
What do you call a nut with a hairy upper lip?
A mustach-io!
Why was the peanut butter upset at his retirement party?
He was roasted.
I love almond milk. It’s unlike any udder milk.
Q: How would a chicken leave?
A: Through the exit.
What happens if a cashew falls down your shirt?
It becomes a chestnut.
Wolf looks like a fox.
It has the sharpest claws.
It has a bushy tail.
To eat, it doesn't fail.
It has a coat of red.
My grandmother has said,
It hunts in search of food.
It is never, never good!
Why did the squirrel ask for a pay raise?
He was paid peanuts.
Foxy the fox was a careless fox. She didn't care about her friend Froggy.
Froggy was a careful frog. One day, Froggy decided to teach the fox a lesson.
Foxy was in her bed sleeping when Froggy made her room an entire mess. She got up, and then her mother berated her for not cleaning her room. From now on, she is a careful fox.
He was walking in the city as he was walking in the city as he was walking in the city as he was walking in the city as he was walking in the city as he was walking in the city hall in French, and then on his way to be a good friend of the situation in the city, as he had been fixed in a few hours of the situation in which he was walking. I will never shiver at the sight [of] words.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Walnut. Walnut who? I walnut tell you. It’s a secret.
"Parademics are so bad, yo mama can't stop!"
A friend asked what an acorn is.
I said, “In a nutshell, it’s an oak tree.”