Lady: will you fuck me?
Man: no, I don’t have a penis.
Lady pulls down mans pants and looks in them. Yes you do! She says
Man: oh, I forgot it was there.
Have you seen all the pants with crazy designs on them, I mean, britches be crazy
Why are people mass buying toilet paper because of the coronavirus?
When someone sneezes, everyone shits their pants.
How do I feed the baby with my pants on?
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to the Super Bowl game.
They had great seats right behind their teams bench.
After the game the guy asked his girlfriend how she liked the experience.
“Oh, I really liked it!” she replied, “Especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.”
Dumbfounded, her boyfriend asked, “What do you mean?”
She said, “Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, ‘Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!’ I’m like, hellooooo! It’s only 25 cents!”
It's embarrassing when there is no toilet paper and you need to go and get one with your pants down. Luckily, the supermarket is just around the corner.
What has two legs but can’t walk? Pants 👖
why did helen keller wear skin tight pants?
so you could read her lips
If your shirt isn't tucked into your pants does that mean your pants are tucked into your shirt?
An alien walks in to a bar. There is a guy sitting next to him and the alien touches his shoulder. The man says do that one more time and I'll run you over. The alien does it again and gets ran over. They get back in the bar and he touches him again. The man says do that again and I'll chop your dick off. He touches him again. The man pulls the aliens pants down and pulls out his knife. He was astonished at what he found. There was nothing there! He looks up at the alien and looks at his finger and fainted.
A man walks over to a little boy and asks "Wanna see my tattoo of a bunny?" the little boy replies with "Yes please i love bunnies" The man proceeds to pull his pants down and said can you see it yet?" The little boy curious says "no where is it?" The man says "dig a little deeper he runs into the whole when he gets scared!"
A pirate walks into a bar and has a ship's wheel in his pants. The bartender asks, "What's with the wheel in your pants?" The pirate replies, "Yarrr! It's drivin' me nuts!"
I went to the doctor because I had a steering wheel in my pants and it was drivin me nuts
I just shed my pants
Boy: can I go to the bathroom? Teacher: if you sing the abcs. Boy: abcdefghijklmnorstuvwxyz! Teacher: where’s the p? The boys answer: in my pants! Lol. That’s all mates! Have a good day! (Or night)
I told my cousin since we're not blood related our parents would let us date.
Her pants were on fire.
Poopy pants ha goteen Use Code Fred_5001 in the fortnite item shop
why do men sag there pants so low and still wear a belt
the same reason women bring their purse on a date and don't pay
i needed a test on if i'm pregnat then the doc said take your pants down then he put his penis in my vagina and said now you are pregnat
A man walks into a bar with an alligator and a stick. He walks up to the bartender and offers to put on a show for the bar's patrons in exchange for a drink. The bartender agrees, so he pulls down his pants, sticks his dick in the alligators mouth and starts whacking it with the stick. After he's done and gets his drink he asks if anyone else would like a go.
A lady gets up and says yes she would like a go, asks that he doesn't hit her with the stick.
