Pizzeria jokes

Hi! Welcome to Papa John's abortion clinic, where yesterday's meat is today's treat. How may I be of service?

Mama Mia's pizzeria and abortion clinic. Your loss is our sauce.

If someone calls you, reply with this: “Hi, this is Dave’s orphanage and pizzeria, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce! How may I assist you today?”

Welcome to Morgan's Morgue and Pizzeria where yesterday's loss is today's sauce!

Papa John's pizzeria and abortion clinic. You make 'em, we bake 'em.

Ahem... if somebody you don't like, or somebody random just calls you in general,

answer the phone with this:

"Hello, thank you for choosing Mama's Pizzeria/Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce, how may I help you?"

or

"Hello, this is David's Orphanage, you make them, we take them, how may I help you?"

Some people's reactions are priceless, and then they wonder about your mental health.

Why were the people on the World Trade Center so pissed?

People, they ordered pepperoni pizza, but they got plane.

This guy walked into a pizzeria and ordered a water. The owner called him an idiot.

His girlfriend walked in and ordered a pineapple pizza.

The guy left her, and the owner made her leave.

The next time you get a sack call, pick up the phone and say, "Welcome to Pete's pizzeria and abortion clinic. Your loss is next week's sauce. How may we help you?"

You work at Papa's Pizzeria, ok?

Boss: You're fired!

Me: Ok?

Worker: Why are you fired?

Me: Oh, you wanna know...

*shows him the oven with my pizza*

Me: I left my pizza in the oven, that bitch burnt as fuck!!

Worker: OH SHIT!!

Boss: Did you say pizza?

Me: I sure did!

*shows boss pizza in oven*

Me: This hoe black as fuck!

Boss: I fired you because I can't stop looking at your ass, not this why?

Hi, this is John's Pizzeria and abortion clinic. Your loss is our sauce!

Hello, This is Jimmy from Jimmy's Pizzeria and Abortion Clinic! Your next loss is our next sauce! How many pizzas do you need?

Where can you donate an aborted fetus?

Your local pizzeria.

Welcome to codi's pizzeria and abortion clinic; your loss is our sauce!

Joe's pizzeria and abortion clinic.

Yesterday's loss is today's sauce.

When your wife gets pregnant and you don't want a kid, just come on down to Momma Mia's Pizzeria and abortion clinic!

I tried getting an abortion, but they said, "Sir, this is a pizzeria."

Hello, welcome to Joe’s Pizzeria and Abortion Clinic, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce! How may I help you today?

On 9/11, the Twin Towers ordered 3 pepperoni pizzas. One came in plain, the other came in late, the third went to the wrong address.

Why did the twin towers complain to the pizza restaurant?... Because they ordered pepperoni pizza and got plain.

A receptionist at the Twin Towers orders two pepperoni pizzas. She was upset when she got two planes.

Why were the Twin Towers mad?

Because they ordered pepperoni pizza and they got plain!