OR jokes
What do you call a vegan cow?
A vegan cow. :/
OR
A regular cow. 🐄🙌
What is faster, hot or cold?
Hot, because you can catch a cold.
It's hard to tell if people are interested in joining my Sarcastic Club or not.
What fell down the tree first, the emo or the apple?
Guess what? The apple, because the emo got left hanging.
"I’m sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing.
Except at a funeral.
How can you tell if an ant is a boy or a girl? If it sinks it’s a girl. If it floats, it’s boy-ant (buoyant).
And the Lord said onto John, "Come forth to receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.
Your mama's so fat, I don’t know if it is a hippo or not.
Who’s stronger in a relationship, a man or a woman? A woman, because it takes six men to carry him to his grave; it only takes one woman to put him there.
Why can't orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is.
I made a website for orphans, but it doesn't have a home page.
Doctor: I’m going to have to turn you away. Orphan: But why? Doctor: Because I’m a family doctor.
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Cause they come back.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Girls are like rocks; the flat ones get skipped.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
If you hit an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
If you hit an orphan with a car, at least you don't have to tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
What does an orphan call a family photo? A selfie.
Why was the orphan a big success? Cause people say go big or go home, he only had one option.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What do orphans and blind kids have in common? They can’t see their parents.
Why can't orphans hear about ancient Egypt? Because they don’t know what a mummy is.
Why are orphans bad at poker? Because they don't know what a full house is.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
If a pregnant emo kills herself, is that murder-suicide or just abortion?
My teacher asked us what sex is. My friend, Bobby, got up and said in a loud, clear voice, "Sex is a temptation caused by a sensation, where a boy puts his location into a woman's destination to increase the population of the next generation. Do you understand my explanation, or do you need a demonstration?" The teacher shot him 23 times before she fainted.
Follow me if you need advice, or just follow me.
My teacher: If you could go anywhere, where would you go?
Me: Demon Slayer.
My teacher: Why?
The quiet kid: TO GET EATEN BY A DEMON OR BECOME ONE!!!
Roses or daisies? Now I know what flowers to put on your casket when I murder that pussy.
Two people wanted pepperoni pizza... Sadly, they got planes.
What number is better; 46 or 47?
I don't know, ask the kid with Down syndrome.
Why do they call priests "father?" Because it's too suspicious to call him "daddy!"
"9/11" or just "7-Eleven" to a Mexican person.
I bet when 2 cheetahs race and one of them cheats, the other one says, "You're such a cheetah!" Then they laugh and go and eat a zebra or whatever.