Office Jokes

I picked up a document, and I started to feel cold.

I looked down at the document, and it read "DRAFT."

There were these three men; their names were Shit, Shut up, and Manners. One day, they were riding in their car, and Shit fell out, so Manners went out to pick Shit up, and Shut up went to the police station.

When he got there, the police officer said, "What's your name, son?" and Shut up said, "Shut up." The officer replies with, "Ummm...excuse me?!" and Shut up said, "Shut up!" and the officer said, "Boy, where are your manners?" and Shut up said, "Round the corner picking up Shit!"

What has more letters than the alphabet? -- The post office.

I think my coworkers are gay. -- Every time I walk by, they mumble, "What an ass."

Two police officers crash their car into a tree. After a moment of silence, one of them says, "Wow, that's got to be the fastest we've ever gotten to an accident site."

To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office: I will find you... You have my Word.

Why was the computer late to work?

Because it had a hard drive!