Numbers jokes
At one point in your life, you were exactly pi years old.
Why do teenage girls hang out in odd-numbered groups?
Because they can't even.
Why was 10 scared?
Because 9/11 came flying in.
John pretended to be a doctor.
Motu came to him. He said, "I lost my hunger."
John brought some samosas for his lunch. Motu ate them. John said, "Your hunger is back!"
Then, Motu said, "I lost my taste."
John said, "Number 1, bring some water." Motu drank it and said, "This is petrol!" John said, "Your taste is back!"
Motu said, "I lost my memory."
John said, "Number 1, bring some medicine." Motu said, "But Number 1 brought water." John said, "Your memory is back!"
"Number 15: Burger King foot lettuce. The last thing you want in your Burger King burger is someone's foot fungus, but as it turns out, that might be what you get."
Memes
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 9.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 8, 9!!!
Your mama so white that her first number was 911.
Kid 1: Words can't describe how ugly you are.
Kid 2: Words can describe how beautiful you are.
Kid 1: Aw, thanks!
Kid 2: But numbers can. 0/10
If 6 is afraid because 7, 8, 9, why is 10 scared?
Because it's in between 9/11.
You are so fat that the last time you stepped on the weighing scale, the doctor said, "I want your weight and not [your] phone number."
The woman became extremely uncomfortable with the man she had just met. While he lay beside her, romantically kissing and stroking her neck he whispered, “I called the number you gave me at the bar tonight. Someone named Alvin answered who has never heard of you.”
How many letters are in the English Alphabet?
Twenty-two. ET went home, P ran down his leg, and he took ME with him.
Why is 6 afraid from 7? 789
A lot of things changed when I got my girlfriend pregnant: my name, my address, and my phone number.
If you call the number 800-273-8500 in Afghanistan, they say, "Can you fly a plane?"
Two magicians were in a competition. The first one did magic, and the second started counting down, "3, 2," but before he said the last number, he 1.
"I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered!"
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 8, 9.
Do you know why 10 was scared? Because he was between 9/11.
If you wanna get fat, what's the quickest way to do it?
Eat two jars of mayo each day, and in about a month, your scale will have your phone number!