Numbers jokes
What's tree plus tree? Sticks! (Three plus three = six)
Ok ok ok so 7 ate 9, but why was 10 scared? Because it was in the middle of 9/11.
When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 and 976 numbers, he doesn't get charged. He holds up the phone, and money falls out.
I wanna tell you a scary math joke, but I'm too squared to tell you.
And there's the referee taking down Ronaldo's number.
Not really the time or the place, but it's good to see that we've kept homophobia out of football.
I find it difficult to count to ten in French: un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six, sept.
I can't say the next one because I have a "huit" allergy.
Why is there no phone in China?
Too many wings, too many wongs; might wing wrong number.
Why was 10 scared?
Because 9/11 came flying in.
John pretended to be a doctor.
Motu came to him. He said, "I lost my hunger."
John brought some samosas for his lunch. Motu ate them. John said, "Your hunger is back!"
Then, Motu said, "I lost my taste."
John said, "Number 1, bring some water." Motu drank it and said, "This is petrol!" John said, "Your taste is back!"
Motu said, "I lost my memory."
John said, "Number 1, bring some medicine." Motu said, "But Number 1 brought water." John said, "Your memory is back!"
"Number 15: Burger King foot lettuce. The last thing you want in your Burger King burger is someone's foot fungus, but as it turns out, that might be what you get."
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 9.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 8, 9!!!
Your mama so white that her first number was 911.
Why is the number 10 always scared?
Answer: He’s in the middle of 9/11.
Everyone knows why 6 is scared of 7, cuz 7 8 9.
But why does 10 have PTSD?
Cuz it’s between 9/11.
Kid 1: Words can't describe how ugly you are.
Kid 2: Words can describe how beautiful you are.
Kid 1: Aw, thanks!
Kid 2: But numbers can. 0/10
If 6 is afraid because 7, 8, 9, why is 10 scared?
Because it's in between 9/11.
"I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered!"
You're hairline is like I was so fat Dora the Explorer couldn't find your numbers!
The woman became extremely uncomfortable with the man she had just met. While he lay beside her, romantically kissing and stroking her neck he whispered, “I called the number you gave me at the bar tonight. Someone named Alvin answered who has never heard of you.”