Number jokes
I walked into the party and the host asked me if I would like a slice of pie.
I responded "yes," and he said: "okay, 14159."
How many children does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Not 27, because my basement is still dark.
I've got 99 problems and one of them is that I count my problems instead of solving them.
Why was 10 traumatized?
Because it was in the middle of 9/11.
Can some hot depressed suicidal guy give me his number so we can cry about being depressed and wanting to die?
Memes
Why is six afraid of seven?
Because seven is a registered sex offender.
Why is the number 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.
Pick a number, syckkkkkkk, that’s the wrong number.
What’s the speed limit in bed?
It’s 68. Once you hit 69, you have to turn back around.
When I’m bored, I text a random number, “I hid the body... now what?”
I went to the tattoo shop and asked for a skull.
A Jewish guy behind me said, "A skull? Back in my day, we could only get numbers!"
What's the difference between Wacko Jacko and Elvis Presley?
14 number 1 hits.
What did 50 do when he was hungry?
58.
9/11... 911... COINCIDENCE I THINK NOT!
Me: Can I get your mom's number?
Friend: Here you go:
Me: Ohh, strange, I already had it.
What's the best thing about fucking 21 year olds?
There's 20 of them.
Q: What's the best thing about fucking 28 year olds?
A: There's 20 of them.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered 6 offender.
The worst joke ever.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.
Why was 9 thankful to 6? Because 6 8 7 2.
Two cats called "1,2,3" & "un, deux, trois" had a swimming race across the channel.
1,2,3 cat won because un, deux, trois cat sank!