How many children does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Not 27, because my basement is still dark.
I've got 99 problems and one of them is that I count my problems instead of solving them.
Why was 10 traumatized?
Because it was in the middle of 9/11.
Here is a jacket for my favorite Jew.
It says, "271032."
Can some hot depressed suicidal guy give me his number so we can cry about being depressed and wanting to die?
Why is six afraid of seven?
Because seven is a registered sex offender.
Why is the number 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.
What’s the speed limit in bed?
It’s 68. Once you hit 69, you have to turn back around.
I went to the tattoo shop and asked for a skull.
A Jewish guy behind me said, "A skull? Back in my day, we could only get numbers!"
Pick a number, syckkkkkkk, that’s the wrong number.
What did 50 do when he was hungry?
58.
9/11... 911... COINCIDENCE I THINK NOT!
What's the best thing about fucking 21 year olds?
There's 20 of them.
Q: What's the best thing about fucking 28 year olds?
A: There's 20 of them.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered 6 offender.
The worst joke ever.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.
Why was 9 thankful to 6? Because 6 8 7 2.
Two cats called "1,2,3" & "un, deux, trois" had a swimming race across the channel.
1,2,3 cat won because un, deux, trois cat sank!
Why don’t Asians use phones?
Cuz they wing da wrong number!!!
Six was scared of seven because 7 8 9, so why was 10 scared? Because he was caught between 9/11.
How many dead prostitutes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
More than three because the basement is still dark!