Worst Jokes Ever
Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn't last as long for fat people.
My girlfriend broke up with me because of my pasta fetish.
I'm feeling cannelloni right now.
Grammar: It's the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit.
Question: What do you call 8 apples?
Answer: The iPhone 8.
Don't trust atoms, they make up everything.
Your momma so fat, when she stepped on the weighing scales, her phone number came up!
You're so small you went surfing on an ice lolly!
You're so small you went hand gliding on a Dorito!
Why did the robot cross the road?
Because he was programmed by the chicken!
In the morning, I become a cereal killer.
I wanted some breakfast, so I grabbed some Life cereal.
I poured it, but lemons came out. So I said, "Well, when life gives you lemons!"
Yo mama's like a fridge, she breaks down when she loses her cool.
What did the Queen Bee say to the other bees? "Beehive yourselves!"
What do you call a sheep on steroids? A woolly mammoth.
What did the boy with no hands get for his birthday?
Gloves!
JK, he hasn't opened it yet.
How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?
Must be more than 13, because my basement is still dark.
Why do mermaids wear seashells?
They are too big for “B” shells, and too small for “D” shells.
It's funny how Stephen Hawking sounds like Stephen walking or Stephen talking, but he can't do any of those things.
What happens when Steven Hawking dies?
Take his iPad to Cash Converters.
What do you call a person with Down syndrome in a bathtub?
Vegetable soup.