Worst Jokes Ever
I always talk to my taco before I eat it.
One time it said it was having a bad day and I asked what's wrong. He said I don't want to taco 'bout it!
Why do I carry pepper spray?
Just in case of as-SAULT.
What is a cow's favorite party game?
Moo-sical chairs!
What do you call a sleeping cow?
A bull-dozer.
What did the mother cow say to the baby cow?
"It's pasture bed time."
Why was the cow afraid?
He was a cow herd.
Bad cows, bad cows, whatcha gonna moo?!
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
When Simba was walking too slow, I told him to mufasa.
You've got a body inside you--it's called your body bones.
I had problems milking my cow one morning. It was an udder failure.
You've got a body inside you. It's called your bones.
Why does sour cream have an expiration date?
What do you call a midget with autism?
A weetard.
What's the difference between Mexicans and stoners? Stoners actually have papers.
I named my daughter Kennedy so when I talked about how her brain was shot out of her head, people just thought I paid really close attention in history.
Why did the bank robber shoot the man with no arms?
Because he told the man to put his hands up.
Hi boyyyy!
If you have a daughter, give her the same name as the mum; that way when you call for a beer, you get two beers, and when you call for sex, you get two sex...
We should stop taking the piss out of Asian people. I mean, they already have enough on their plates... like cats and dogs.